I am so sorry guys for the very late update. I promise will give regular and quick updates from now on…
SwaSan wakes up to another beautiful morning at Coorg. Sanskar leaves to the farm. Swara and Sanjana go to the temple. On their return, Swara and Sanjana settled on an embankment of the road. And they discussed some regular stuff about their families for sometime. The discussion gradually moved to their childhood. They discussed about various games they used to play, about teachers and their school life. Swara explained how much she loves music. Finally they reached the point of careers. They both stopped at a moment when this topic came. Sanjana knows about Swara’s fondness towards music. But Swara is totally clueless about Sanjana. All that Swara knows about Sanjana is ,she is a house wife. She doesn’t expected much from this lady as she almost looks lost in her domestic chores
Sanjana slowly opened her mouth,
‘I am graduate of Architecture,Swara. I did it from Local university. I was the topper and my Professors always used to appreciate my innovative designs. They suggested me to apply for higher studies abroad. I finally made my mood to request my dad. I was sure that he will accept it, after all he was the one who used to help me in completing my projects. He used to appreciate every innovative idea of mine. I still remember that proud smile on his face whenever people used to appreciate me.
But that day when I reached home, I saw many new people in my house. My mom introduced me to all, and my dad is looking at me with same love, but the happiness his eyes depicted is something new to me. I sat with the people uncomfortably. Once they left, my parents announced that they are my would be In-laws and the marriage date is fixed. It came up like a blow to me. I wanted to ask them about this sudden proposal. But my words got struck in my mind. I still feel, I would have tried once that day. But my dad is World to me and his happy face restricted me to deny it. At that time, I couldn’t decide what I actually want. Soon Srikhar entered my life. I said him many times about the achievements of my college life. I said him that I want to continue my studies. But all my attempts failed by his love. The first year of our marriage life was like heaven, with all happy moments. The next year I conceived. And from then my world turned upside down. That’s a different issue.
My one minute silence and cowardice changed my entire life. I really regret now. When ever I introduce myself as house wife, I don’t feel bad yet it hurts me a bit. And now I got some enough strength to speak up and I thought to speak about it with Srikhar.
But something in dragging me back. My mind is saying you don’t remember your subjects now. You can’t achieve anything even if you try doing it…’
She wipes her tears. Swara’s face is pale. She doesn’t know what to say, she doesn’t know how to pacify her
Sanjana smiles and continues, ‘ what am I saying? Swara cheer up. I am happy. I felt like sharing it with you. I am not at all sad about it. I have everything in my life now. Good house, good family, sweet children, lots of money….what not! I am happy’
Swara smiles back. Uneasy silence filled between the friends. They head to leave.
Once entering the home, Swara recollects Sanjana’s words. She felt bad for her. After all, who can understand Sanjana’s pain better than her. She could read the disappointment in Sanjana’s eyes. It made her remember her one of the conversations with her sister Ragini.
‘Swara what’s your problem in accepting Chachi ji’s words, you overthink everything’, Ragini says to Swara.
‘Ragini, I don’t have any problem with it. Becoming mother is one of the best moments of a woman life. But I want some more time. I want to build music career’, replies Swara.
‘Career! I know Swara but you can concentrate on it later too’, Ragini argued.
‘Later? Will that ‘Later’ ever come in my life? Ragini, I don’t even get time to practice. I fear that I will forget everything I learnt. It is late now. After sometime it becomes too late. I almost forgot about my dream, which I used to see since my childhood. It is just few days before I realised. I don’t want to delay it more. And music is your career too. You have become Mother now, why aren’t you thinking of your career now? Because you are so much involved in the happiness given to you by family,but you will regret one day like me’, says Swara.
‘Because It was never my dream to become Singer Swara. It was dad’s dream which I was fulfilling. And I am fed up doing it. Because I don’t know what I really want. May be that’s why, I find it difficult to understand your pain.’
Many people in my life and everyone has different opinions. But I really want to know, how many in this world are suffering like me, who are compromising like me, who are happy yet sad. She sighs.
She takes her phone and calls Sanskar.
‘Sanskar, have you met them today?’ asks Swara curiously.
‘ No Swara, I couldn’t’, replies Sanskar.
‘Sanskar! Don’t you find something wrong about these meetings? How come, every day you miss meeting them. Are trading staff doing something?’
‘Swara, it’s not like that. I have interacted with the trading staff. They are good and professional. They all are educated too. I don’t think they will have any problems or ego clashes with daily wage labourers. It’s only that everyday something or the other happens and I miss meeting them. I am going to the farm now to meet them as per your idea.’
Swara smiles and hangs up the call.
She plays guitar for sometime thinking of how to balance her life.
She gets bored and thinks of surprising Sanskar by visiting the farm. She packs the lunch for him and leaves.
Sanskar gets surprised seeing her there. He is so happy. Ofcourse,who won’t be! When the person you love the most, shows how much special you are to him/her, that’s the best feeling ever. They eat lunch together. Then Sanskar introduces his wife to the staff. They then decides to go to the farm together. But rain cancelled their plan. Sanskar again gets involved in the work. Swara sits in his cabin watching the rain through the window. After few hours the rain stopped. As it is getting dark SwaSan leave for home. As their car proceeds to the home, a man follows them on bike and disappears in the mid way.
To be continued…