SWASAN – MR MAHESHWARI AND I
Heyy, It’s Anjali back with the next chapter!!!
Thnxx for comments and to my silent readers….
HAVE FUN!!!
Chapter 48
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Swara challenging Sanskaar
CHAPTER 49
Swara : You know the Bade Papa for whom you’re doing all this? If I’m not wrong about him, I’m pretty sure he would be disappointed in you if he saw you today.
Sanskaar watched her blankly as she entered the house.
Sanskaar : Is this true? Will Bade Papa really hate me for this?
He looked at the shut door and sat on the steps. He for got his meeting, his contract, everything. Swara’s words were echoing round his brain. Bade Papa disappointed in him? The man for whom Sanskaar could give away his own life would never forgive him?
Sanskaar : Was I wrong about everything?
He got up in a daze and opened the door to his car. He sat down and started it but of course it didn’t start. Frustrated, he shouted.
Sanskaar : WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU NOW?
Then he remembered about the tyres and got down.
Sanskaar : Something’s wrong with me or the world. It should be me. What should? It is me…. I know it, Swara knows it. I…. I can’t do this anymore.
As he kept musing about his dilemma, his phone rang.
Sanskaar (curtly) : What is it, Mr Raj?
Raj (with caution. sensing Sanskaar’s voice) : Sir! The meeting will start in 15 minutes, Where are you?
Sanskaar (exploding) : I DON’T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE MEETING! I have something else to think about. Cancel the blo*dy meeting Raj, and don’t dare call again.
Raj (beseechingly) : Sir…
Sanskaar (warning in his tone) : Mr Raj, I…
Raj (in a rush so that Sanskaar wouldn’t cut the call) : Sir, I hate to ask you to come for the meeting… But, you know how important this is to us. The Luthra Group deal would be very beneficial for us. A huge profit, 200 men and women will get jobs, The industry will improve. Please sir, You have to come for the meeting. Many lives will improve by this.
Sanskaar sighed. He knew that Raj was right. He couldn’t let so many lives be ruined by him.
Sanskaar (giving a short laugh, thinking) : I have already ruined two lives… Swara’s and mine. I can’t handle any more than that.
Sanskaar : Raj! Tell them that the meeting has been posted by 20 minutes. Do whatever you have to and keep them there. I’m coming.
Raj : Ji Sir!
Sanskaar cut the call and wondered what to do. His car was punctured, Laksh’s car was in Darjeeling, Adarsh had taken his car to God knew where and the spare car was being used by his mothers.
Sanskaar : Wait… Swara’s car is still there in Gadodia Nivas. I can just go there and get it. I’ll call Ragini.
He dialled her number.
Ragini : Hello?
Sanskaar (false cheery voice) : Ragini! Hey..
Ragini : Ouch… You sound like a donkey who has lost his child. Is something wrong?
Sanskaar : What nonsense Ragini.. I’m perfectly fine. Woh I just..
Ragini (cutting him off) : Is Swara fine?
Sanskaar ( surprised, asking with a bit of caution) : Swara? Why?
Ragini : Well, I called her today and she spoke to me as usual.
Sanskaar (relieved) : See? Then why are you asking me that?
Ragini : Sanskaar! You forget that I’ve lived with her for almost my entire life… I can understand when she’s happy or sad, even if I can’t figure out why . It’s how I figured out she loves you.
Sanskaar was even more shocked by that statement but remained quiet.
Ragini (a sad tone creeping into her voice) : Sanskaar! She loves you. You know that, Don’t you? Too much maybe… I can’t complain. I have Karan. Just…. Please never hurt her. She… She isn’t just my sister. She has been my strength, my protector, my hope… Everything. I don’t know what happened between you two, But solve it soon.
Sanskaar (in a strangled sort of voice) : I need your car Ragini, I’ll come there in a while for the keys. Bye..
He cut the call but kept staring at the phone in his hand… It was burning through his hands. Ragini’s question, Swara’s words, his decision…
Sanskaar : This decision was supposed to make everything alright again.. But why does it make everyone feel so shitty? Why is no one happy?
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AFTER THE MEETING
Mr Luthra : Thank you, Mr Maheshwari! This deal will certainly benefit both of us.
Sanskaar (in his suave, businessman voice) : The pleasure is all mine, Mr Luthra! I agree, This deal will definitely be a huge success.
Mr Luthra : I heard that you had got married a few days ago… I am so sorry to have disturbed you for the meeting. You had to spend time away from your beautiful wife.
Sanskaar inwardly flinched at the name of Swara again. Time away? That was what he had wanted. But everywhere he went, Thoughts of Swara plagued him. Even during his meeting, he had thought about her. What would she be doing now? Was their relationship irreparable?
Sanskaar ( warmly laughing ) : Don’t worry Mr Luthra! I will be going home now anyways.
Mr Luthra : My wife is hosting a small dinner party three days from now. She and I will be honured if you and Mrs Maheshwari attend.
Sanskaar : Sure! We will definitely attend. Mr Luthra… I’m so sorry but I have to go. I am…
Mr Luthra : Don’t worry, Mr Maheshwari. Please go on.
Sanskaar fled from there. He wanted to be alone. His mind was going bonkers with all the thoughts in his head. He needed to clear his head and he knew just the place to do it.
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AN HOUR AND A HALF LATER
Sanskaar was annoyed. He had come to White’s, the exclusive men’s club to have a drink and sit alone. But he hadn’t had even a moment to himself. People had been coming up to him and talking and talking. Didn’t they have any other work at 3 in the afternoon?
So far, Twelve of them had come up and spoken to him about stuff. And each one had mentioned Swara. He was trying to have a minute to himself and these lazy pigs were not allowing him to have one.
Sanskaar ordered his third drink just as one of his acquaintances, Sandeep Hooda came and spoke to him. Sanskaar inwardly groaned. He had never liked the man. With his too silky hair and evil cat eyes… He considered Sandeep to be obnoxious and snobbish. That man had never learnt to be kind to people who were not as well off as him.
Sandeep (jovially) : Sanskaar! Great to see you here…. But at this time?
Sanskaar (irritated) : Just Aise hi… Hey Sandeep.
Sandeep : Ah yes! I suppose you wanted to escape from the wife. What’s her name now… Swapna.. no Swarupa…
Sanskaar (gritting his teeth) : Swara!
Sandeep (not sensing Sanskaar’s tone) : Ah yes! Swara… A Gadodia if I’m not mistaken.
Sanskaar (really pissed off now) : Mistaken? You were present in each and every function. Swara Gadodia weds Sanskaar Maheshwari.
Sandeep : Alright, Alright.. Don’t get touchy. Vaise, It’s only been 2 days since the wedding and you’re already here? The wife’s troubling you huh?
Sanskaar : The WIFE has a name. Swara Maheshwari.
Sandeep : Wow.. Really touchy today Sanskaar! The wife must have done something big huh? Why did you marry her anyways? She’s not rich or pretty…
Sanskaar looked at Sandeep furious.
Sanskaar (warning in his tone) : Sandeep…
Sandeep (not listening at all) : Well, The only reason you could have possibly married the girl is because she must have been… Well, you know?
Sanskaar : No… I do not know!
Sandeep : Ah yes! Sanskaar, Don’t you understand…. She…. good in bed… tadan tadan..
He winked at Sanskaar who saw red! He got up and took Sandeep’s collar in his hands.
Sanskaar : You WRETCH! How dare you talk about MY WIFE this way? SHE IS MY WIFE.. SWARA MAHESHWARI! DON’T YOU DARE LAY EYES ON HER! I WILL KILL YOU.. I WILL..
Two men pulled them apart and Sandeep went out after apologising to Sanskaar. The rest of the men in the club left Sanskaar alone, realising that a man in rage is best left alone.
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4 HOURS LATER
Sanskaar was still in the club, down in the dumps. His anger had abated but it made him feel worse than ever. He didn’t like the person he was becoming. A grouch, a coward, a person who hurt people.
After the incident with Sandeep , Sanskaar went on to become mind-blowingly drunk. He was just starting to nurse his hangover. His head was pounding, his ears were ringing, and Adarsh and Karan, who had been surprised to discover him in such a state at the club, were talking far too loudly.
Sanskaar put his hands over his ears and groaned. Everyone was talking far too loudly.
Adarsh : Did Swara ask you not to come home?
The two of them laughed while Sanskaar lifted his head just enough to give him a baleful glare.
Sanskaar : Don’t you two have girlfriends named Sakshi and Ragini to spend time with?
Karan : Well, We were spending time with them but all they are talking about is Swara.
Sanskaar : STOP talking. My head hurts.
Adarsh : Swara definitely booted him out. But why?
They sat in thankful silence for a while when Karan slapped the table with his hands.
Sanskaar : Did you HAVE to do that?
Karan (grinning) : Ears a bit sensitive, are they?
Sanskaar (muttering) : I want a pistol…
Adarsh (surprised) : A pistol? Why?
Sanskaar : So that I can KILL you both. Then we’ll have some silence in this Goddamn place.
Adarsh laughed. Just then Adarsh’s phone rang.
Adarsh : Oh look! Laksh is face timing me.
Sanskaar slapped his forehead in exasperation. GREAT! Another Maheshwari to irritate him.
Laksh’s cheerful voice penetrated his thoughts.
Laksh : Hey guys!
Karan : Hey Laksh… How’s Darjeeling?
Laksh (in a slightly different tone) : It’s really good, Karan! Sanskaar, You look…
Sanskaar : Hungover! I’m hungover… And no one’s blo*dy allowing me to be alone!
Laksh (amused) : Well, We are your brothers. How do you expect us to leave you alone?
Sanskaar (groaning) : This is not the evening for bromance. We’ll do this another day…
Laksh : Shall I give you some advice?
Sanskaar : You may NOT!
Adarsh and Karan stared at the exchange fascinated.
Laksh : Well, You know I’m going to tell anyways. (Sanskaar growled) Listen carefully, Sanskaar! Whatever you did, Just apologise for it. I know you, and I know Swara, and knowing what I know…. I’m pretty sure you did something…
Sanskaar : Knowing who knowing what who where? What the hell is he blabbering?
Karan : I think he’s trying to tell that you’re being an IDIOT!
Laksh (grinning) : BINGO!
Sanskaar : Listen, It is complicated, okay…
Adarsh : It always is.
Sanskaar : That’s it…. SHUT UP! You are with Sakshi but it’s different when you’re married. And same goes for you with Ragini… As for you Laksh, when a donkey like you finds a woman gullible enough to actually marry you, THEN you may think of giving me advice. Until then, SHUT UP!
Karan (thinking) : Is he drunk or angry?
Adarsh : Well, He was drunk, I guess. Now he’s hungover.
Laksh : So that means, he’s angry.
Sanskaar spread one hand over his face and pressed hard against his temples with his thumb and middle finger.
Sanskaar : Do you think you three could just leave me alone? I want to THINK.
Adarsh (his voice gentle for once) : Go home, Bhai!
Sanskaar closed his eyes and let out a long breath. There was nothing he wanted to do more, but he wasn’t sure what to say to Swara, and more importantly, he had no idea how he’d feel once he got there. He wasn’t going to do anything else to make her hate him. It would destroy them both forever. But if he went home now, What could he tell her?
Laksh (agreeing) : Yes Bhai! Go home. Go to your beautiful wife. And tell her you love her. Tell Swara that. It’s really simple.
And suddenly it was simple. He had to tell Swara that he loved her. Now. This very day. He had to make sure she knew, and he vowed to spend every last minute of his miserably short life proving it to her.
It was too late to change the destiny of his heart. He’d tried not to fall in love, and he’d failed. Since he wasn’t likely to fall back out of love, he might as well make the best of the situation. He was going to be haunted by the premonition of his own death whether or not Swara knew of his love for her. Wouldn’t he be happier during these last few years if he spent them loving her openly and honestly?
But he wouldn’t tell her of his premonitions, though. What would be the point? He might suffer the knowledge that their time together would be cut short, but why should she? Better she be struck by sharp and sudden pain at his death than suffer the anticipation of it beforehand.
He was going to die. Everyone died, he reminded himself. He was just going to have to do it sooner rather than later. He was going to enjoy his last years with every breath of his being. It might have been more convenient not to have fallen in love, but now that he had, he wasn’t going to hide from it.
It was simple. His world was Swara. If he denied that, he might as well stop breathing right now.
Sanskaar (abruptly getting up ) : I have to go home.
Adarsh (grinning) : I know you do.
Karan : All the best, Bhai!
Laksh (simply) : GO!
Sanskaar had to grin. His brothers and future brother-in-law were really good people. And smart…
Laksh : Yes, we know! We love you too.
They laughed and Sanskaar ran home
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Sanskaar’s great big plans went bust.
There he was, running.. well, getting into a cab and rushing home to tell Swara he loved her. Instead , he came home to find a gaggle of old aunties and Swara playing the the perfect bahu, serving them tea.
He entered the hallway and tried to run to his room quickly, but before that, Badi Ma saw him.
AP : Sanskaar beta! You’re here. Good. Come here and tell hello to everyone.
Sanskaar reluctantly came there. At least, he had brushed his teeth and was smelling fresh.
Sanskaar (politely) : Hello!
HE slowly moved near Swara who was standing quietly. But as soon as he got there, Swara moved away.
One of the aunties : Swara beta! I heard you sing during the sangeet… You sing beautifully. Will you please sing for us?
Sanskaar looked at Swara, but she didn’t look back at him. She smiled at the ladies and sang.
Mere yaara tere gham agar payenge
Humein teri hai kasam, hum sanwar jayenge (x2)
Sanskaar stared hard at her. Swara always managed to converse her love through songs. She was a marvel. Swara raised her eyes and looked at him.
Do yeh saugaat tum, tto zamaane ki hum
Do yeh saugaat tum, tto zamaane ki hum
Har khushi se mukar jayenge
Hum mar jayenge
Hum mar jayenge
Mere yaara tere gham agar paayenge
Humein teri hai kasam, hum sanwar jayenge
Tere kaandhe se hi lag ke
Yaara beete umar saari
Socho kaisi hogi kismat
Hua yun tto phir humaari
Saare aansoon toh ho tere
Aur aankhein ho humaari
Tere dard humein, jo mile pyaar mein
Tere dard humein jo mile pyaar mein
Hum khushi se yun bhar jaayenge
Hum mar jaayenge ho o..
Hum mar jaayenge
Mere yaara tere gham agar paayenge
Humein teri hai kasam, hum sanwar jaayenge
Sanskaar couldn’t stand it anymore. He went near Swara and took her hand in his. He stared at her and sang.
Chaahe dukh ho, chaahe sukh ho
Dil ne tujhko hi pukaara
Tune humko hai banaaya
Tune humko hai sanwaara
Jahaan ko to rab ka hai, humein tera hai sahaara
Bas tera saath ho, chaahe jo baat ho
Bas tera saath ho, chaahe jo baat ho
Tere kehne se kar jaayenge
Hum mar jaayenge ho o..
Hum mar jaayenge
Swara : Mere yaara tere gham agar paayenge
Humein teri hai kasam, hum sanwar jaayenge
Sanskaar : Mere yaara tere gham agar paayenge
Humein teri hai qasam hum sanwar jaayenge
Swara left Sanskaar’s hand as soon as one of the ladies complimented her.
Lady : Seriously, Sujata ji! Swara sings beautifully and Sanskaar also joining her? What an amazing pair these two make.
Swara (politely) : Please excuse me..
She ran upstairs while Sanskaar looked on. He called after her, but she didn’t turn back. Sanskaar started after her.
Sujata : Sanskaar! Ek minute beta..
Sanskaar conversed with Sujata for what seemed like 3 hours, before she let him go upstairs ten minutes later. He saw Swara staring at a picture crying softly.
Sanskaar (distressed) : Swara!
Swara held a hand up and wiped her tears.
Swara : I don’t want to talk anymore.
Sanskaar : Swara, Please..
Swara raised her tear-stained face to look at him. He was blown by the hurt in her eyes.. Hurt which HE HAD CAUSED. Sanskaar was disgusted with himself.
Swara : Fine… What do you want to tell? That I should not love you? Or I should hate you? I need to leave you alone? I’ll do it. I don’t want to talk to you either. I’m done.
Sanskaar (shocked) : Swara!
She got up and looked at the picture in her hands. It was one of Bade Papa and Sanskaar taken in US when Sanskaar was 18. She smiled looking at the picture.
Swara : You loved him very much… I get that! He practically raised you. You are what you are today because of him. And when he left you, he took something away from you. I get that also. But what you don’t get is that the rest of us love you too. You are hurting Sanskaar, I know that… I did everything I could to erase that hurt but all I’m doing is making it worse.
Sanskaar wanted to tell so much. How Swara was wrong, how much he needed her. But his mouth remained clamped shut.
Swara (laughing slightly) : I must be really self obsessed and egotistic. I thought I could remove 8 years of pain with my love. I failed. But you don’t understand too. Just because you are hurting doesn’t mean I am not too. I hurt every moment without you. I cannot go on with this lying love-hate relationship. It’s better to have one with no feelings. So I agree, Let’s have a society marriage. No feelings. Only pretending to be loving each other. Having children and growing old. Let’s do it.
Sanskaar (fiercely) : Shut up Swara! I don’t want that…
Swara (shouting) : Then WHAT DO YOU WANT?
She was crying now..
Swara : If you’re hurting because of another girl, I can solve it. IF it is someone at work, I can fix it. But how the hell am I supposed to compete with a dead guy? How? I atleast have a shot with someone alive…. I don’t think I am strong enough for anymore pain. So please, Either tell me the truth…. Or let me go today. We will begin our society marriage tomorrow.
Sanskaar caught her hand.
Sanskaar : I can’t let you go. I WON’T let you go…
Swara (looking beseechingly) : Then tell me the truth.. Please?
Sanskaar became quiet. Swara smiled sadly. She placed her hands around Sanskaar’s cheek and kissed him gently. It was an act of surrender. An act of good-bye.
She began walking to go outside. Sanskaar started panicking. He COULDN’T lose Swara. Suddenly, The whole world went sideways for him. If Swara wasn’t there, nothing was.
And Sanskaar made his choice. SWARA was the choice.. He wouldn’t let her go. He would tell her the entire truth.
Sanskaar (falling to his knees, choking) : Swara…
Swara didn’t stop.
Sanskaar (louder) : SWARA! Please… I am begging you.. Please listen to me! Swara Maheshwari, I did all this because I AM GOING TO DIE!
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PRECAP : The cat’s out of the bag 🙂 🙂 🙂
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First of all, song courtesy to Neha! Thnxxx Neha.. You mentioned it for the sangeet.. But I knew this song would be perfect for this track. Thnxxx LOVE YOU <3 <3
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I know many of you.. or some of you wanted me to continue with the hate thing or whatever… But frankly, whatever i wrote then was nonsense.. So no more of that.. 🙂 🙂
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Hope you all like this chappie…
As for PKDH, I am taking a break from it… I have not been giving it my full concentration because of mmai and I don't want to jeopardise the story there.. So I wil continue that whenever possible. Sorry.. 🙁 🙁
Coll begins tomorrow :'( :'(
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