Until then I shall wait…
“I won’t glorify or romanticise heartbreak.. for me it was a kind of death and i was force to keep living….. yes.. my heart broke.. and the reason for it were u… but i simply couldn’t tell u so.. neither i could tell u how much did i love u.. nor could i tell u.. how it felt when u broke my heart…” I thought… peeping through the glass window of the train…. i was going to my grandma’s house… from the early childhood days i have been visiting my grandma with my mom… bt today.. my journey was all alone…. it was very cold outside… bt thankfully the ac didnt made me feel so… i sipped through the coffee when my phone vibrated…
I took it out… a msg popped up… “ finally u ran away?? M not shocked….tu jhalli ki jhalli rhe gyi..”
As always his message made me smile…. my childhood, Teenage, adulthood.. and every single day of life till now.. would have been incomplete without this guy… i still remember our first meet when we were “chotu bachhas”… we hardly spoke in those days…. later our friendship begin… and we became good sorry very good friends… yet….
Its easy to say that ….its not important that every love story would have a happy ending… bt its very difficult to realise and say ‘my love story didn’t have a happy ending’… it could have been the most romantic one… but i chose to keep quiet.. maybe i was very small to realize the true meaning of love.. Therefore i fail to understand it’s not just infatuation.. But a real love…
I wont say that i had been very loyal lover and only loved him for these long years… i had many crushes… who never turned out to be my love… but i remember something… it was the day when i told him about my crush ….
K: u like him?
T: yeah.. i mean he is cute…
K: did u tell him??
T: no.. not yet… idk what he feels so..
K: if the feeling is true don’t hesitate…its india… people only wait for train and police.. nd not for anything else…
T: no need to tell… i know it well..
K: when u know it. Then don’t let history repeat!!
I was taken aback by his last line… what did he mean… m i thinking right?? May be….
I felt a bit bad.. that he has a guilt feeling for this reason… that he left me… yeah.. as i said we were friends.. and i had started liking him… bt couldn’t tell him thinking it would affect our friendship… on the other hand he also had feelings for me.. bt never told thinking the same. Hence both of us chose our friendship first.. but he moved on with someone else…. only this was the difference… and i guess this is the only reason y he wanted me to settle with someone else…
But idk.. y… i was never successful in doing so.. i mean i had a relationship with someone for few months.. but it didnt work out… i always feel there is nothing like our friendship… but then a terrifying thought comes to my mind… ‘do i still love him?’ i ignore this question everytime… but today when m away from him i feel may be its true…
Our friendship has enhanced over the years … but i simply couldn’t forget the time we spent together….
An incident from our high school….
He was chatting with his gf.. and i was also there… due to some reason there was a fight between them… kunj raised his voice and said… “ i cant do that…”
His gf was furious and said “ do whatever u like”
Me: guys.. calm down.. and kunj i guess she is right…
K: twinkle… how could u do this to me?? M I not ur best friend??
I gave him a fake smile… all the way home i only thought about his words… ‘best friend’ may be… actually yes.. no one could have taken his place.. there has been a lot of instances where i was uncomfortable bt he gave me certain advices which no one else would have given…
Its true we care for each other… bt the fact is that unlike me he is a very loyal boyfriend… who loves his gf..
I simply couldn’t let him go out of my mind….
—————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————-
I reached my grandma’s place early in the morning… my phone was constantly vibrating… he has sent me so many messages…
Kunj: tu aise kaise chali gyi mujhe chorke…
Bata ke jati..
Mein bhi chalta tera sath…
Achha ek reply to dede…
Kab wapis ayegi…
I replied “kunj.. i was in train.. no network there.. so how would i reply… anyways.. what would u have done coming here??”
I got instant reply.. “ arey i was missing our hangouts… it has been ages…”
Me: hmm let me come back and then we shall hangout …..
He: ok
Me: hmm
He: waise u should nt have ran away like this..
Me: plzz yaar not any more.. i guess we had a discussion on it…
He: twinkle… it was ur engagement… and u cancelled it.. like y??
Me: just like that.. before engaging with someone i want some fresh air…
He: ok.. tu rook.. me ata hu..
Me: kaha jar he ho??
He: idiot.. m coming to ur grandma’s place…
I jumped out of my bed.. “what???”
Just then i heard a horn… i went to the balcony.. it was his car…
Me: kunj!!
He came out of the car waving…
Grandma received him.. and after wards while having coffee…
Me: tu yaha.. i mean..??
He: i thought for a while and then got out with my car..
Me: u could have talked later on.. y did u drive such a long distance..
He: its okay.. bt my best friend is upset thats not at all ok..
I stood up and went to the balcony.. “ nothing.. just normal stress before marriage..”
He turned me round “twinkle… c’mon tell me”
I couldn’t control my emotions see him there.. .. i broke down…. he consoled me.. but i cried a lot…
Me: kunj.. m sorry.. bt i cant let go any of my childhood memories… i cant ignore my feelings… i still LOVE U…
I cried…. he was looking at me… then he smiled and hugged me… i hugged him tight.. i know i was doing wrong..bt then couldn’t control my emotions… after some time when i returned to my senses i broke the hug.. nd looked at him.. he was still smiling ..
Me: m sorry.. woh..
He: twinkle.. its good that u told me.. it will give u a relief….
Just then we saw a shooting star…
He: oh look.. shooting star.. c’mon lets wish…
I wished and so did he…
He: what did u wished?
Me: that u and Alisha are always together..
I really had wished that… and was happy with my wish..
He: oh.. thanks
Me: aur tumne kya manga??
He: ‘tumhe’ !!
Me: haaaa??
I was totally shocked..
He: yeah… except this life.. agle har janam mein…
I smiled widely… i guess that was all i needed… and i can spent my entire life with this gift….
—————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————-
“THERE ARE A LOT OF ASPECTS OF GETTING LOVE, PROVIDED U IDENTIFY IT..”
THE END
Hey guys.. hope u like it..this piece is very dear to me.. so i would love to know how u ppl found it… plzzzzzzzzzzzz comment and let me know… i am waiting eagerly.. silent readers are requested to comment… as well..