AN: Something that came up in my mind… ?
Happy Reading.?
Not Proofread. Kindly excuse the errors.
DISCLAIMER : No way related to actual history or historical figures. Purely fictional.
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HIS MOTHER’S SON
Chandra had pushed Nandhini on to the floor again… Both, Chandra himself and Nandhini were stunned thinking what had gotten into him all of a sudden… But this time Nandhini was not planning to let it go as she had done the previous few times… No this time she needed to let him know she would not take it lying down! So she got up and shouted, “Chandra!”
When he looked stunned at her raised voice, she continued, “What are you doing, Chandra? This is the fourth time you are manhandling me and pushing me on the floor! Who gave you the right to manhandle me? And please don’t say me you are my husband! Because being a husband doesn’t give anyone right to manhandle and abuse their wife! I’m your wife not a slave!” She gave him a terse look and continued, “And I know now I’m not a queen but a dai ma to Bindusaar but does your actions justify what you claim yourself to be ? A believer in equality? A person who saves women from the husbands and others who tried to sell them? A person who stood against his own guru so that a girl can get her right for education? A person who time and again stood against any kind of injustice meted out to women?”
Chandra was now standing with downcast eyes… She gently continued, “I know you believe I killed Dhurdhara and you hate me for that but do remember that I came here only because you asked me to…” Saying so she left from there…
Chandra felt ashamed for his behavior. He had lost his senses when he pushed her. It was all becoming too much for him, the battle between his heart and brain was overwhelming him… On one side his heart wanted to take her in his arms and never let her go and on the other, his brain hated that very thought! Every touch on her body felt like ice and fire, heaven and hell at the same time… He wanted to mark her as his but the same time his brain kept reminding him that she wasn’t worth it… That she would break his heart again… Every time she came in front of him, his senses got all mangled… Her soft perfume, a smell so unique to her… a mixture of her bath salts, herbs, sweat and tears… always overpowered his senses whenever she was in his vicinity… intoxicating him… Then there were her beguiling smiles, her authoritative talk as if she still, very much considered herself to be his wife…
All these little things of hers were like a magnet pulling him to her, like she was what his soul’s much needed salvation… But then always in the very last minute his better sense prevailed and he repelled her away from him…
But now, it was the first time he actually realized that in all these inner struggles and tug of war between his brain and heart he was physically abusing her, his wife…his Nandhini! He, Chandra Gupt Maurya had become so weak suddenly that he was behaving like any other drunkard man who excuses his abominable behavior to being not in his senses… They blamed it on alcohol for manhandling their wives and here is blaming his inner struggles for manhandling his… He felt ashamed on his behavior and like Nandhini had said, he was the one who always stood for equality… even against his own guru and now he was this… this person who didn’t practice what he himself preached… And his mother? The mother who raised him so lovingly? Oh God! How would he ever face her? What would she think of this behavior of his?
Chandra felt a surge of sudden deep anger against himself for such an unforgivable behavior… He angrily went to the nearby lamp and placed his hand on it, punishing himself. Not anyone, not even he himself should ever say that Maharaj Chandra Gupt Maurya was unjust…
Nandhini who had been near the exit couldn’t but turn and have a look at him. She knew her words would have hurt him… But she had to make him realize that what he was doing in anger was against his own principles as a king and as a kind human she knew he was… She did not want to be the reason his image was tarnished… She should have left the palace when his mother had asked… It wouldn’t have come to this…
But when she saw what he was doing to himself, she ran and pushed his hand from the fire! She gave him a quelling look and started to blow onto his hand. He was too shocked to react as he did not expect her to come and save him albeit from his own punishment… She then poured some cold water to his hand and tended to his injury all the way blowing gently on it. And he still stood there stunned not even realizing the pain… She made him sit on his bed telling him to sit still and went to get some medicine for his burn. She then came back with few herbs and started to grind in a mortar and pestle all the way muttering about how he could do something so silly and so on…
Her constant flow of words finally broke his daze and he smiled hearing her concern. So when she finally turned to bring the ground medicine to him, she saw him smiling at her direction. She then turned back to check whether there was somebody behind her… Finding no one she asked annoyed,” why are you smiling now?” His smile widened at her irritated tone and just shook his head indicating nothing. She then became busy putting medicine on his hand carefully and tied it up in a bandage. And all the while he kept looking at her tending to his wounds even after he hurt her…
Just when it was all done and she got up to leave, he pulled her hand. She turned towards him with inquiring eyes… And he simply said, “Sorry. I know there is no excuse for my behavior but trust me this was the last you see such behavior from me. The mother who had raised me, had raised me well, Nandhini. She had raised me to respect all women. And I had sworn that I will, especially because I used to stand there as a helpless kid when my father used to ill-treat her every day because of me, an orphan kid she raised… I had sworn that I would never be like him…never ill-treat a women… But just today I realized that unknowingly I was becoming his mirror image… the very man I hated when I grew up… Please forgive me Nandhini… I swear I will uphold my mother’s upbringing this time… I will never allow myself to tarnish her name…I will always be just in my actions and won’t ever allow my anger to the get the better of me… ”
He took a minute to look at her and ensure that she understood the sincerity in his words and continued, “Now since you didn’t like the punishment I gave myself, I leave it upon you to punish me for the unfair treatment meted to you…I will accept any punishment you give. It’s my promise, Chandra Gupt Maurya’s promise.”
Nandhini hadn’t expected him to offer her such an unconditional apology. She was humbled before the king who true to the name he had earned in being just. But hearing about his childhood days where he had to witness his father ill-treating his mother, she felt sorry for him… It must have been really hard on that small kid witnessing such deeds against his mother and now he thinks he had become someone like that person who hurt his mother…What could be worse than that thought?
She had wanted him to realize his mistake but she didn’t want this… she didn’t want him to go on a mode of self-flagellation… She felt she needed to bring him out of his depressive chain of thought and said, ” Chandra I don’t have a punishment to give you…” He started to protest but she gently spoke over him saying, “But I do have a request.” Chandra looked at her blanky… She said, ” Chandra if you can do one thing for me, Chandra… please forgive… that kid Chandra…”
At his confused look she said, “Please forgive that helpless kid in your memories Chandra. It was never his fault that his mother got hurt. And his mother would feel sad if she ever comes to know that he still feels guilty and blames himself for what happened then… Let go Chandra… You are not and never will be that cruel… You will never be the one you hate… I know you have been caught in an emotional turmoil… I just wanted to prevent you from losing yourself in that…”
Chandra was yet again astonished by her maturity… he used to call her ‘Bholi murkh’, but he sometimes forgot that emotionally she had been always stronger than him… just as his mother was during those trying times. Here, he had thought she would ask him to trust her regarding Dhurdhara’s murder, as he had promised her anything she wished as punishment and there she went ahead to stun him to silence by asking him to forgive himself, his frustrated childhood self… who still in some deep recess of his mind cries helplessly thinking he was unable to save his mother during all those miserable days when her only crime was that she had loved him, an orphan at that time more than she could ever love even if he were her own son…
A tear almost escaped his eyes as he made true his promise…He finally forgave that boy because he finally realized it was not his fault… it was nobody’s fault but his father’s who drank alcohol and bet his mother… No matter whom he blamed the blame was solely his, his father’s… just like he had realized no matter what he felt around Nandhini, the responsibility of his behavior was no one’s but his. He finally felt at peace with himself…
He turned to thank her but found that she had left from there… He smiled to himself… His struggles were far from being over and many of it contained Nandhini in it, but he was happy that at least some deep old part of him was healed today… He thanked God for small kindness…
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AN : Happy mother’s day! ? Dedicated to my dear wonderful mother and all the other lovely mothers out there who take pains to raise their kids the right way… ? Every good person is good in this world because of them. ❤