HARSH SHOCKING REALITIES OF LIFE

After much time finally I have sit to write something……But the question is what exactly I should write…….My eyes just gives her image and though one month has been passed I still can’t believe that the most harsh hell reality that is loss of my best friend is true…….She use to tell so many things to me and some times I use to remain quiet as I had my own reasons for remaining away from all things and she turns her face like a kid and some times tears also comes from her eyes………Those non-stoppable tears keeps me much worried and ignoring all those tensions and my own priorities I rushes and hugs her and she soon gives a smile on her face which brings a kind of unknown joy to me ….I don’t know how to pen them in words ……

When I came to kalburgi as part of my job and started staying in a hostel my life was a kind of running machine only……Office-work- Hostel …….And on these busy schedule I was missing so many things and when she [her name is Keerthi and I calls her kittu] came to my room and as soon as we started sharing room and so many things , I felt much happiness from heart …. Things were going well, but as we know some times things changes and all those sweetness changes as bitterness as life’s journey is like that only……. One day at my office I faced a worst thing regarding work and I felt much anger when I was blamed for an act which I can’t imagine in my dream …..With hyper tension I returned to hostel and when I find kittu has wear my kurti and jeans , anger in me formed like a spark and I just burst out it at her……..I spoken too much and this time she don’t cried and within a minute she removed those dress and ….. She said …”I forgot this is yours , this is mine as for the past 4 months we share everything and just like that I wear this….Trust me , only when you said this is your’s I realized that I am wearing reni’s dress, not mine……And don’t worry today I won;t cry as I know that will make you sad…….” I hugged her tightly and only tears came from my eyes as I was out of mind that what should I tell…….Just one word sorry came from me and she suddenly kissed at my forehead and waved her hand on my head……I felt like my mom is caring me ……

I didn’t cried at that day when I saw her last time as she was sleeping calmly and I was just looking at her face only…….My heart was telling me kittu will wake up, she can’t leave her friend……When the rituals were finished and I realized that she will never come back , I cried a lot in the closed hostel room ………. Gradually I tried adapting the situation and continued to lead my life , but at every nights I misses her badly …..My eyes just searches kittu in her bed and her smiling face……..Soon I close my eyes as I knows reality should be accepted…….

Kittu is alive in my heart and she tells me to move on as that’s life and I am trying to do it…….

AN ; I DON’T KNOW WHY I WRITE THIS , BUT IT JUST HAPPENED ONLY……SORRY IF THIS HAS HURT ANY ONE’S FEELINGS …….