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gauri bhadrakali chapter 4.
before you start reading this , this passage contains abusive language , so kids , you should stop right there (unless you think you can handle it of course, who am i to stop you )and people with a tiny tolerance level, this is not the place for you , i do not mean to offend anybody but this is just my opinion that i am stating , but i’m sorry if it does offend you.
first of all guys, thank you so so so so so much for those over whelming comments and feedbacks , feels really good to be back . without much of waiting , let me get to the story , which is what ya’ll want
recap: dwelling into gauri’s past , and how she met daaksha.
the loud cry of the 6 month old new born in the oberoi mansion woke omkara up from his sleep , his usual morning head ache wasn’t even a bother for him anymore , the two years of experience taught him how to tackle the situation , though experience in the wrong area , he opened the fridge beside his bed , there was a cut lemon , he quickly took the lemon out and squeezed it into his tongue showing no expression of a normal person , probably the fact that omkara never really liked sweets or because he was so used to repeating the same routine every morning , either one of the two were the reasons .
he quickly runs out of the room to shivaay’s and anika’s room , only to see them peacefully sleeping cuddling inside their blanket with shivika in between them , for a moment there omkara thought about how situations would have been if gauri was still with him , even though ansh was crying for the past minute or so, omkara was never a light sleeper , and his stress added to the situation , where as anika and shivaay are usually dead tired running around shivika and ansh during the daytime . omkara glanced at the clock , it was only 4 , he wondered to himself , how is it that today , i was able to sleep for a longer time than the other days , probably because he dreamt of gauri yesterday night , her flipping gol gappa’s into her mouth , and some man , some man travelling and laughing with her in a car , the thought of another man with gauri made omkara really angry , it was not a conscious reaction , but one that cannot be controlled , all these thoughts were running through his head as he picked ansh up and took his feeding bottle and began feeding him , as he walked around , he couldn’t help but think of the man that gauri was with , he said to himself out loud “i mean , i’m really sure she would have moved on by now , she’s probably married and maybe she even has kids , kids who have big beautiful eyes like hers , kids who will become gol gappa eating monsters “ omkara muffled a laugh under his breathe , “only to go back to another man” … his heart was shredded into pieces even as he tried dismissing those thoughts from his head . suddenly a thought sprang into his head , almost like poetry , it was not a conscious effort , but something very raw , very much from the heart . he put ansh to sleep , apart from anika , om was the only one who could , it was almost as if he could understand what the innocent mutters of children meant and they understood the emotions behind the mask he was putting . he suddenly ran to his room , took out a book , and wrote…
can you see it coming,
sprouting through the buried soil,
from the seed you unknowingly sow.
can you catch it as it grows,
spreading tender leaves green,
feeding on your sinister thoughts.
can you nip it off? can you ?
before the sapling gains ground,
jealousy … spreading its roots .
only to realise what he had penned down after he had written it , it were his emotions , waiting to come out like boiling milk from the vessel , he always knew that he had feelings for gauri , there was something between them , but he never registered them until this moment , he did not want to accept it to himself ,but omkara was more mature than shivaay to acknowledge his feelings . after a few minutes of battling with himself inside his brain , omkara found himself going to the canvas that was lying in the corner of the room , it was as if his brain wasn’t controlling his body anymore , it was like his heart was , he tried to stop himself but the hands of his brain were tied behind freeing the heart of an artist , he took his paint brush and other painting materials , and sat down , cracked his knuckles , which meant he was down in the business ,
an hour , two hours , three hours passed , by this time , everybody had come down for breakfast , they waited for om , but as time passed even further , om was not coming out of his room, everybody began freaking the f**k out of themselves , they did not know if om had done stupid things , because of situations , but they knew for a fact that om was not that much of a weakling , but even then , shivaay got really worried , he went to om’s room , but through a window , he noticed something he hadn’t seen in the past three years , om sitting in front of his canvas and painting , shivaay’s happiness knew no bounds , he dint want to disturb his brother as he was spending time doing art after so long , but immediately ,shivaay facetimed rudra , and showed him what was in front of his sight , though rudra was pissed off at om , he was so happy seeing what he saw , “bhaiyya , hamara om hain kya yeh , mujhe yakeen hi nahi ho raha “ said rudra , shivaay couldn’t say anything , he choked up with happiness , all he did was nod his head letting the tears roll out of his eyes and inside the screen , the same was happening too . “ “kya bhaiyya should i start singing lafzon ka yeh rishta now ? will you stop crying if i sing that ?” rudra attempts his stupid joke to make shivaay laugh , and it did the job so perfectly .
om was too involved in his art , it was as if nobody existed other than his art and himself , everything was in a still for him , omkara’s brain did not realise what it was sketching , the heart was in charge now , several hours later , did omkara realise that he had sketched out his dream , his jealousy had come out , sprang out into a life outside of his head , his words made sense to him now ,
( Like This )
“can you nip it off? can you ?
before the sapling gains ground,
jealousy … spreading its roots .”
he so badly wanted to see gauri at this moment , probably more than he longed for his mother , it was as if his heart knew she was the one all along , but his brain had won the battle last time , this time , fate knew it was time for the brain to take the backstage now. after finishing his art , he set it aside , safely , because it was omkara’s first piece of evidence that could prove that he loved her , the origination of the thought that made him realise he loved her , but what could he do now ? nothing , he has lost , lost in the battle of love , “ what dadi says is wrong , dadi says ishqbaazi wins all the time , but i guess she was wrong , there is no way i can get her back now , not after whatever i’ve done , i feel like , is she comes back , mom would come back , but i’m not going to do anything , because i f**king deserve this … “ breaking his chain of thoughts , omkara gets a message from his manager . om looks .
“sir , this is james , i wanted to tell you about something that might interest you , there is a world poets meet thats going to take place this weekend , its not a competition or anything , but just a meet that takes place every five years , anybody interested can join in , you can meet several poets and artists, since you told me you were not able to find motivation or inspiration in anything , i thought this would be the perfect occasion for you , i’ll text the address sir , it is in colmar sir , in this cafe called shayari , i must say sir , the place is beautiful , its not a kind of place that you find when you step out , it is perfect for an artist , you have to search for the place , i mean , its a very laid back place , something thats your style sir , if you’d like to visit , i can ask the pilot to be there for you sir , its after two days .
om thinks for while , without realising , he texts …”yes james , i’d like to visit , please do the needful , i will be boarding a flight tonight” he surprised himself by sending the message , omkara felt like something was pulling him towards this situation , it was like the missing pieces of the puzzle was coming back to him , it was like he was slowly seeing the pieces of his broken heart , pieces that were scattered , though he wasn’t able to pick it up , he had found them.
he goes out to the breakfast table , as hungry as an elephant , he wondered why he was feeling better than how he usually does , he vacated the thought and sat down , finished his breakfast . everybody in the house noticed that there was a spark in his eyes , a spark that was lost two years back.
omkara goes to the pool area , he sees anika , shivaay and their kids , they were playing together , shivaay was tickling shivika and anika was making ansh laugh by blowing into his ears . om is not one to intrude a family time , but this time he was left with no choice , “ bhabhi , shivaay , i need to talk to you about something “ they look towards him , anika was hoping for something good as shivaay was telling her about om getting paint on his hands again . “ tell us om , we’re all ears” said anika , “ i’m going to colmar , there is a poets meet there , and i want to go , i have decided something , that i will try to become a better person , i cannot guarantee anything , but i will try , and thats all i can promise.” shivaay had tears in his eyes , he had not hear om say anything of this sort in the last two years , all he did was put a hand over omkaras hand as a sign of acknowledgement and nodded his head a little which meant he agreed . anika was so happy seeing om trying to actually get better , she did not know why he was trying , but she called out to om before he left the room , took his hand in hers , brought him near the pool , and asked him to sit with her and dip his legs into the water , om did as told , then anika spoke , “ i want you to silently listen to everything i’m saying om ,
everybody knows that mistakes are a part of life , but what you might not know is that there are so many reasons as to why it is okay to make mistakes om . i will admit that i like to strive for perfection in everything that i do , however i know that if i mess up here and there , it will not be the end of the world .knowing why it is okay to make mistakes in life is key to happy living.i have learnt just how important these reasons can be in my life and im sure you would be able to apply them in yours too , one of the best reasons why its okay to make mistakes is that you learn a ton from them. see like , when you were a child and you fell of your cycle and scraped your kneww , it might have hurt you but you did learn its not the smartest idea to do a wheelie down your street , hain na ? omkara nodded in acceptance , om, if you think you are the only single person in the world who makes mistakes , i can definitely prove you wrong . a daily thought of mine used to be , why can’t i just do this right ? or why do i keep making mistakes ? this kind of an attitude would bring my mood down the rest of the day . but then i speak to either shivaay or dadi on the phone and i reassure myself that i am not alone , waise hi , we are all here for you om . remember that in this big huge world , where there has to have been at least one person who makes mistakes and survive , hum perfect nahi hain om . you just need to deal with the fact that life is about learning and you cannot learn without messing up things and getting your shit together , doing things that you are unsure or helps you find out who you are , what other people think is a mistake might differ from your definition of a mistake , you need to find that out for yourself . main yeh nahi keh rahi hoon ki when other people say jumping off a bridge is a mistake , tum use try out karke find out karo , but trying that laddoo that someone else does not like is a way to discover if you like it or not , reality yahi hain ki mistakes are needed to living a healthy life , without having things go wrong or having everything come out the way you planned , you wouldn’t be able to learn and avoid from them next time , so if something doesn’t go right , or as expected , don’t be so hard on yourself om , we are all here for you , no matter what .”
om was in tears by the time anika finished , he also felt that he had been too hard on himself , all he did was hug anika , a lot of unsaid emotions were passed through that one hug. shivaay was so happy to see this .
that night om boards his flight , and drifts off to sleep with the feeling of satisfaction , that night om has a dream …
a girl , she is wearing a long dress , ( Like This ) om is drawn towards her , she smells like lavender , a strong yet a calm sense of smell , it was a type of pleasure for his sense of smell , she has black hair that crops upto the nape of her neck , he notices a small tattoo on her back , it says om ( Like This ) , he feels a familiar feeling , his heart tells him to go her , suddenly , she walks into the beach and she vanishes into the water , ( Like This ) suddenly om feels suffocated and in a sudden jerk he wakes up , only to hear the pilot say that the flight will land in approximately ten minutes .
gauri is running around managing her restaurant as one of the biggest occasions were about to take place in her cafe , as she was putting the lavender flowers in place ( Like This ) , she felt like something , something like the waves of water suddenly touched her back , she touches the nape of her neck , and there was nothing except a tattoo that said “om” she brushes off her thoughts and says to her herself “gauri you f**king idiot , i told you to sleep early yesterday , see , now you started hallucinating too” . brushing off her thoughts , she gets back to work .
precap : om see’s gauri and daaksha , he walks upto gauri without his brain having the reigns of his mind and body .