“Today I’m going to interview the famous singer Miss. Swara Bose”. I chuckled at my statement. Miss. Swara Bose was and is my love. Look at my fate, today I’m going to meet her face to face. While my staffs wanted to do this interview my boss rejected all and selected me for the interview as he considered myself a best journalist.
I entered into the cabin where the interview is going to be held. I took a deep breath in but I won’t be able to make it. I won’t be able to see her eyes. I requested my boss for a dark room and he didn’t question me why, he instantly approved my request.
I came back to cabin and sat on my chair. The room was filled with darkness I would hear my fast breathe to myself. This why I asked for the permission. I setted up everything for the recordings and closed my eyes all lost in my deep thoughts.
Swara wanted to give her personal information which she had always kept in secrets. I know that I would be apart of her secrets. I’m going to cherish this moment like the way I cherish all our get together.
Swara has always loved and loved being with music. She just loved me they way she loved music. I have seen the spark whenever she sang. I just loved her voice, her beautiful eyes, her everything. I left calcutta after getting apart from her and now in mumbai. Nothing was the same after I came here. I had to change my looks, identity for her. I didn’t want her to find me but I’m already being proud of her great achievements.
The cabin door got opened a little. This made me to break my thoughts, I could see a petite figure entering into the room. I know it’s her. Taking my breathe in control my emotions.
“Miss. Boss, please ahead forward and at right u have ur seat there” I sounded professional.
Professional in the way that she cannot find that’s me.
“It’s a great idea, I love this dark room interview. it’s going to be great.” She was amused. Her voice has turned more sweeter than before.
“So, Miss. Bose why have you wanted to tell about your secrets? That too why you chose our magazine?” I asked turning on my recorder.
“Well, it was just like that. I want to encounter my secrets to everyone and about your second question I just love your magazine” She answered with a deep voice.
“Did you have any support to get into this industry?” I asked.
“No, I had none and with my own efforts I did came up this way high”. Her voice sounded professional too
“There were rumors that u sing and compose each and every single song for the one u love? Is that true?”
“Hmm…. Yes it’s true” She agreed making a big smile on my face.
“May I know your name?” She asked making my heart stop for a movement.
Should I tell her my real name? No no I shouldn’t.
“My name is Varun” I said with no emotion.
“Varun” She repeated my word.
“Can I tell you something? Don’t take me wrong but no men’s name can come correct in my tongue except his”.
My heart spang hearing her words.
“What do you want to share to us Miss. Bose?” I asked her.
“It will be better if you call me swara, that will be great for me.”
“Sure miss…. Swara” I closed my eyes and after years I was telling her name. My heart beamed with happiness by saying her name out.
“Should I ask you questions or do want to tell it yourself?” I asked.
“It will be better if I say it myself, I guess”.
“Is that all about him you are going to tell about?” My heart yelled at me for asking a question which I already know a answer myself.
“Everything starts and ends with him, Varun” These words are enough for me to smile once again.
“May I know his name?” He chuckled at myself silently. I was asking my own name to her but I just want to hear my name from her.
“Ha… Nope not now maybe I tell you by the way” she said.
“Continue” I said.
“I met him when I was eleven here in Mumbai. I came to the temple which was in outskirts of Mumbai. He helped me to lit the lamp when I was struggling to leave them in the river which was behind the temple. That is where we became friends. Talking about us we got to know that we both were from calcutta and belong to same school. I came to calcutta and we both met in our school. Years just passed and unknowingly I started liking him so much. I was nervous whether he will accept me, but I was confirmed that he likes me in return. He accepted wholeheartedly and I was jumping in joy. He used to be there whenever I sang. We spent so much time even though I was getting practiced for singing. I loved him the way he was. He was just perfect for me. My parents doesn’t support me in anything so I had to stand up on my own. All those times whenever I was broken and needed someone he was there for me. Sanskar was a perfect man whom every girl dreams of! Well, I said that in flow. His name is sanskar”. Her voice was filled with love.
My heart skipped a beat when I heard my name from her after so long years.
“Then how did you miss him?” I questioned.
“Actually we completed our schooling at it was time to go for our college. I was leaving my city for the college as I was selected for an audition for my voice and I was going to my study there itself. I’ve already told him about it and we met near a small pond at evening. I was happy but I never expected that day to be worse in my life. His words still ring up my mind whenever I think of him” her voice sounded sad.
I closed my eyes and unexpected I felt my cheeks wet. Unknowingly I was crying…
Swara came happily with her guitar and saw sanskar standing looking at the pond with folded arms near his chest.
She squealed. Sanskar looked at her.
SAN: When are you going?
SWA: Tomorrow morning, you r also coming na?
Sanskar held both her arms in his.
SAN: I won’t be able to make it swara.
SWA: But why? (Shockingly)
SAN: You will be busy with your studies and recordings swara. What will I do there?
SWA: No sanskar, even here we had our time na? Then y not there?
SAN: No swara. I can’t leave back everything here.
Swara tried to interrupt but sanskar didn’t let her and held her more closer to him. Swara’s eyes were moist. Sanskar felt bad but he had to do this.
SAN: I know very well that u will be achieve what u want, to become a singer but we can’t be together.
Sanskar took her in his arms. He felt her tears wetting his shirt.
SWA: No…. Please.
SAN: No swara. We have to do this. It is needed for us.
He closed his eyes tightly. Swara broke the hug and looked at him with hurt and pain in her eyes.
SAN: U will surrounded with so many handsome, hot mens more than me. You will forget me when the days goes by.
He chuckled sadly. Swara was totally shocked at his words. How can he think that way? When he knows that she can’t look another man except him in her life. Sanskar smiled sadly sensing her thoughts.
SAN: Goodbye, My love.
He gave a kiss on her forehead, both shared a short eyelock and sanskar left leaving wiping his tears which came on his way as he couldn’t control anymore leaving behind the shattered swara.
There was complete silence for few minutes. I very well know she would be crying silently.
“With no other go I left the town. I didn’t know why he did that but later on I got to know why he told me. He wanted me to stand on my own feet, achieve my dream. He didn’t want me to depend on him. Maybe if we were together like I wanted before then he was right. I was busy with recordings the whole day and at evenings I had to attend my college. I had no time and I would have not had time for him. It would have lead to our breakup too. I was so proud to have him as my love”. Her voice was filled with proudness.
I just smiled and wiped my tears.
“Didn’t you search for him?” I gulped in my tears and asked her.
“Yes I did. After my very first recording I went back to my place and searched for him but he wasn’t there. I heard that his parents passed away and he left somewhere. He stopped talking with his friends too. I felt really bad as sanskar’s mom and dad wasn’t there. They loved me like their own daughter. His mom and dad would have been so much happy if they would have get to about our love”. Her voice was filled with emotions.
I smiled sadly.
“Why do want to share this?” I questioned her.
“I tried many times to find him but I couldn’t. Maybe he can reach me through this interview. Maybe he can read this and contact me. I still have my old number just for him. Every day I wish to get his call but alas that has never happened!” She said sadly.
“The interview is done thank you for the interview Miss. Bose” I stood and wished her.
“That’s my pleasure” She said
I switched off my recorder.
“Can I use my mobile for a minute?” She added.
“Yes u can” I answered and went to the switch board.
She took her mobile and started checking something.
I don’t know how she will react seeing me. The one whom she loves and misses so much. I don’t know how I’m going to handle her. Taking in a deep breath I switched on the lights and looked at her.
I have seen her in many news, concerts etc but today she was real in front of me. She looked more beautiful than before wearing a black shirt with leather jacket and jeans with hairs left free. She was dressed up in a rockstar avatar. Her style has increased.
She was still looking at her mobile.
“Thanks Varun, it was great being with you” She looked me and was saying in a professional tone.
I was looking down, I didn’t want her to see my eyes.
“Same here” I replied and was going out. I can feel her standing behind me for the exit.
I came out, my boss and swara was talking. I stood in one corner and was admiring her. Sensing her that she is going to look at me I looked at something else.
“Sanskar, come everyone let’s take a picture” my boss called me and she looked at me.
I nodded my head without looking at her
and stood beside swara and all the other staffs were also present. We took a group picture.
“It was great you here in our mist Miss. Boss” my boss said.
“My pleasure” she said and took her coolers, wore it and left.
I immediately took excuse from my boss that I have personal work and he agreed.
I just wanted to tell her that I’m her sanskar. I would have told her that time itself but I didn’t want to. I wanted to spend time with her for sometime alone after so many years.
I reached my bike in the parking lot. Taking in a deep breath I dialed her number. How can I ever forget that number?
The phone rang and after few rings she took the call.
“Hello” She said, I was just lost in her voice. That sweet voice which I have craved to hear them….
Closing my eyes to control my emotions I continued.
“Sanskar here” There was no more professionalism here. It was just she and me!
“Sanskar” Her voice sounded suprised and shocked.
“Hmm” I just hummed.
“How are you? And……” I didn’t let her speak.
“Come to the place where we met for the first time at 9:30” I said and disconnected the call before she would say anything about it.
The day I dreamt of for years is here today. With my happiness I took my bike and started driving to that place as already it was 8:30 and it will take one hour as the temple is situated in outskirts.
(Sanskar’s pov ends)
Am I dreaming or what? Is that really my sanskar who called me? Now this is too much to wait. I immediately wore my chudidhar which was in Royal blue, his favorite colour. Made my hairs free with silver hooks in my ears, wore kajal and a white stone bindhi. After a long time I was looking like a real me. I started my car and drove it on my own. Every single time whenever I miss him I go to that temple, the place which made both of us together. I’m so much excited to meet him. His voice was still the same but it was more manly. I’m sure he would look too handsome as that time itself girls fall for him so much.
Here I am! I’ve reached the place. The river which was in the backside of the temple. Lamps were litten up. I saw a man who was tall but I could see only his back.
“Sanskar” I called out his name and the young man looked at me.
I was literally shocked seeing him. Was he sanskar? I looked into his eyes and yes he was my sanskar. I can feel million emotions flowing into me.
He came near and immediately hugged him tightly. How many days I craved for this hug, His arms! and today it’s happening.
I broke the hug but still we were in the same position.
“Why the hell you didn’t tell me that it was u?” I started yelling at him and that is when something striked my mind.
“Oh that is why u was looking at him na?” My tone turned soft, while he gave his smile which made my heart skip a beat.
“Sorry” he held his ears with a sorry face and then wiped my tear filled face.
He was soooo cute.
“It’s k” I sniffed and smiled back.
“Why did you come in this dress Miss. Bose?” His statement meant to tease me.
“Dare u call me Miss. Bose and I’m here as swara, ur swara not as the famous swara Bose” I said in a soft voice.
“You look too beautiful” he caressed her cheek making me blush hard.
His intensive gaze was burning me alive, yet I loved that feel. He took his hand of and took my hands in his.
“Are u still angry on me, swara? Actually I didn’t want to encounter this in my office so…..” His said.
After a long time I was hearing my name from him. I was feeling each and evey second a blessed one today.
“That’s fine, I can never be angry on my sanskar”. I said lovingly.
We both shared a eyelock. An eyelock which should many emotions at one time. Our words cannot explain the way which our eyes does.
“U r still single?” I teased him.
“Hmm…… No” he replied making me shocked.
“What?” I said trying to hide my shocked face.
“Yes! She is my life, my love and infact I’m going to get married soon” he said all smiling but this sentence was enough for me to break.
How can he do that to me? I loved him so much that I didn’t look even a man after I loved him but he…… How can he cheat me?
“Congrats” I said in a heavy voice while my eyes turned glassy.
I took two steps back from him as we were standing close, I was looking down.
“U didn’t ask who it was?” He said while he tucked my hair strands behind my ears which was coming on my face due to air as I was in free hair.
God this man is killing me already and now I had to ask him this ah? I swear if I see that girl I will kill her for snatching my sanskar away from me.
“Who?” I asked just to know her and kill her.
“You…. Miss. Swara Bose” he smiled brightly.
“Oh……” I replied in sad tone.
Wait, wait he told me “you” that’s me then. I looked at him and he looked at me.
“Idiot girl, how can I ever think of another girl when you have already stolen away my heart and soul” he said wiping my tears once again.
“Will you marry me?” He asked sitting on his knees and asking me to give my hand.
“Yes, damn yes” I made him stand.
I hugged him tightly and he hugged me back. I was just feeling the moment. We both looked at each other with lots of love showing in our eyes. He made his forehead connected with mine.
“I love you swara”
“I love you too sanskar”