*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
In the middle of deep darkness, door opens on what looks like a simple bedroom with a small closet near the door, a small table desk and naked walls surrounding a bed with without pillows or blankets which contact is hard to her back as she lays down closing her eyes a painful moan escaping her throat.
Quivering, she’s unable to feel anything else but confusion, fear and coldness as near troubling noises are followed by fire crackles, slowly warmness spread its wings around with the fainting lights dancing along with moving shadows on the walls… window’s view shows a wonderful far white mountaintops and thin snowflakes twirling round and round in hypnotic silent dance… soon, her eyelids become heavier dropping her in deep void.
She’s dragged out from calmness by a soft touch over her cheek, she could see that strong hand stocking her cheek up to her forehead then down to her neck and throat… whisperers are caressing her ear but she can’t hear them clearly. She wants to touch that palpating hand but forces seem have abandoned her members as she feels it reaching her pulls’ hem snatching it up abruptly making her tremble more, when her jeans’ button is undone, an unexpected force makes her grip the two hands on her waist… but those hands takes her face forcefully, the whisperers repeating again at her deaf ears and her racing heart beats fails to keep their regular rhythm as she feels them caressing her cheeks slowly, kindly spreading warmness in them under the hot breath approaching them…
Her eyelids closes again briefly then are immediately wide opened as she feels a sweet tender caress brushing against her lips slowly… tasting, discovering and giving, making blood boil suddenly under her skin making its way up to her cheeks and down deep in her belly… waves of what looks like electroshocks sparkles all over her numb senses.
Her hands grips those maintaining her face in place in an instinctive attempts to push them away, but hotness wining all her members is unwillingly ordering them to stay still and accept, receive… then soon demand as her reddened wet lips start tasting back too. In that uncontrolled moment, she can’t resist the force taking her hands above her head while her mouth is invaded suddenly in a deeper caress making her groan from unknown sentient making her feeling achingly in need, a need she’s unable to even define.
Those lips leave hers for her jaw, throat and discovered cleavage, she struggles not knowing if it’s for asking a hold or claiming more but when the straps of her bra are slide down, she can’t help but turn her face away closing her eyes tightly in shyness.
She’s kissed again, rough hungry kisses overwhelming her as her hands find their way in his silky strands of hair pulling hard on them in response as she tries to catch her breath between those invading assaults… her waving chest arcs up abruptly feeling his hands discovering her tender skin at the end of his fingertips… from a swift caress to a possessive touch, loud moans escapes her dried throat begging for mercy desperately as she can’t bear the aching unknown pleasure exploding inside her.
Somewhere between her shattered overwhelming feelings, she has been discarded from her jean and socks and the chilling sensation of nakedness is immediately replaced by his hands and lips taking in their discovering way all her wills and she surrenders to the burning fire flowing in her veins all over her body on which she has no more any control… suddenly wrapped in a possessive embrace, she sees his beautiful brown eyes detailing her face keenly asking… waiting… she palms his lovely face feeling their hearts’ beats racing madly in chorus and just at the moment she nods in agreement… she wakes up screaming:
“- SANSKAR!!!”
Drowned in tears and sweat, Swara sits up in her bed with a jerk panting madly, her throat dried, her eyes widened, all her body trembling in place… she looks around frowning her hand on her chest trying to calm her racing heart… she swallows hardly gulping the needed oxygen in huge amounts. She’s startled as Ragini opens the door asking worriedly:
“- Swara? Kya hua?… everything ok? You’ve seen a nightmare?”
Swara can’t handle her enquiring gaze, she lowers her eyes feeling her cheeks turning red and grips her bed sheets tightly mumbling:
“- Maria kaha hai?”
Ragini pours some water for her and she thanks her heatedly as she replies:
“- it’s Sunday, she asked permission to go to the Church in the town… do you need anything?”
Swara nods in no still looking down to her hands, Ragini looks to her for a moment before standing up saying:
“- i’ll prepare breakfast”
She’s surprised feeling Swara’s hand gripping hers, when she sits back face to her, she’s shocked to see her plunge in her embrace hugging her tightly which makes her break down crying badly, how she missed her sister’s closeness!
Swara was still trembling, images and feelings from her dream troubling her and she’s unable to formulate them in words.
She’s used to talk to Sanskar about everything, he would be able to reassure her giving her a clear explanation and making her feel better… but THIS!!! How could she talk to him about?
She’s still unable to define what it’s about but she certainly feels like it’s something too intimate to talk about to him… to anyone!
Still she’s scared like hell from the vivid images still haunting her and the feelings which accompanied her from dreamland to reality… she asked for Maria by instincts, but she knows she wouldn’t be able to talk about it to her too.
Feeling her shoulder wetting by Ragini’s tears, she frowns parting away from her and asks:
“- you… you’re c… crying? Did you… get hurt?”
Ragini shakes her head saying no and smiles to her innocence replying;
“- I just missed you, Swara!”
Swara looks away to the widow giving her the view of the same white mountaintops far away, she looks around detailing the bedroom’s rich colored furniture, it definitely can’t be about here…
Looking back to her sister, she asks childishly:
“- I’m here, na?… how can you miss me?”
Ragini smiles wider, Swara’s innocence isn’t a result of her health state, she has always been like this, a child in a woman’s body.
She sees her get up and approaches the window asking:
“- Ragini?… when will it snow?”
Ragini joins her at the window and says:
“- atey Swara, we’re in summer, even in Ladakh it won’t snow in this season”
Swara stays silent for a moment then says pensively:
“- here, you never know”
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Taking a place in the bus, Sanskar looks to the photo he has in hands smilingly. Swara looks so beautiful laughing this much, children all around and Arjun sitting in his lap tries to close his eyes as he asks a kiss from his Swara mummy…
A lone tear escapes his eyes landing over the brilliant paper, he turns to the window at his side and looks to the white mountaintop welcoming him back far away in this land where he won it all… where he lost it all too! Ladakh!
His memories flow back to that confrontation he had with both Ragini and Laksh when they confessed “finally” what really happened on that weeding day where Swara’s mind couldn’t bear it anymore and just disconnected from the whole external world… this cruel and hostile world where she’s forced to marry her sister’s lover against a small boy’s life. he tightens his fist on the chair’s back in front of him thinking about her helplessness when he was just too much away…
In flashbacks, he recalls their last conversation on phone:
*-*-* FLASHBACK *-*-*
“- kya hua, Swara? You’re worrying me… what’s going on?”
“- kuch nahi Sanskar, I promise… just make sure nothing will happen to Arjun and we’ll sort it out when you’ll be back!”
“- but…”
“- no but, please…”
…
“- damn it, Swara!!! What’s happening? Why are you crying?”
“- please Sanskar… please… you love me, hai na?”
…
“- hai na?”
“- you know that, princess!”
“- so just save Arjun and come back to me soon… I’ll be waiting for your call”
…
…
“- Sanskar?”
“- hum?”
“- you’re upset?”
…
“- don’t… please! I promise to tell you everything after Arjun’s surgery, ok?”
“- as you wish princess… just take care of yourself”
“- same to you… I’ll wait for your call, Doctor Kapoor”
“- and I’ll be waiting for…”
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
The bus stops abruptly snatching him from his memories. He packs back the photo getting down and takes a deep breath. He walks for hours remembering Laksh’s words:
*-*-* FLASHBACK *-*-*
“- I told you Sanskar, we love her too and this why even knowing that you’re still in contact with her via Maria, we didn’t say it to anyone…”
“- in exchange of what?”
“- nothing… we’re even offering more!”
Frowning, he sees Ragini takes out a photo from her bag and puts it on the table:
“- this is Swara’s last trip before her coma… it was in Kashemir”
Sanskar barely looks at it wondering if they’re aware of his presence in the pic, Laksh’ continues:
“- since her return back home, Swara is fascinated by this photo, she passes all her day looking to it…”
Ragini adds:
“- I told her about the association she had and the trips, her wal’’s photos helped a lot… still it’s this one which marked her the most”
As they both are silent for a moment, Sanskar asks:
“- and?”
Ragini looks to Laksh’ first then replies:
“- and we succeeded convincing Papa and Dadi Ma about letting us take her there for some days… family will join us after some weeks but until then…”
Laksh’ ends her sentence:
“- you have carte blanche… think about it Sanskar, it’s now or never… we know that only you can help her and we’ll help you for that”
Ragini wipes her tears and asks him:
“- so doctor Kapoor… will you come there?”
*-*-* END OF FLASHBACK *-*-*
Sanskar arrives to a small chalet near a lake outside the town, he takes the key under the flower’s pot at the entry and opens the door. It’s a small house in an isolated place without any surrounding but prairies…
Putting his bag down in the entry, he walks toward a closed door that he opens slowly… a simple bedroom with naked walls, a small closet and fireplace where ashes are the last memory of the last time he was there… with Swara!
To be continued!