Chapter 20
He was on his knees and was looking at her. Her face was cupped in her hands and she was sobbing. Shivay directed his hand towards her but then he stops because she lifted her head up and looked at him with pleading expressions. “This is what you wanted to hear na?” she was feeling guilty on her confession. She didn’t want to admit her feeling in front of him. She was acting strong in front of everyone but this man didn’t let her be strong this time. She saw disappointment and hurt in his eyes few seconds ago and she couldn’t handle it because she knew that this disappointment was because of her. yes, it’s true that she loves him but she was not proud on her feeling, infect she was ashamed on this feeling because according to her, she was not pure enough to love someone like Shivay.
“Tell me! this is what you wanted to hear?” she said it out a little loudly.
Shivay looked at her frightened eyes. She was not looking at him. Both stayed there for seconds like frozen sculptures and then Shivay broke the silence. “ I have been waiting to hear this from so long” he gently placed his hand on hers and looked at her with teary eyes. This moment was supposed to be special and romantic but it was awkward and weird. Anika was ashamed on her confession and Shivay was shocked and confused.
ANIKA: I didn’t want to say this Shivay…I didn’t…but you made me say this. (She was complaining and while complaining she removed her hand from his hold)
Shivay was not able to understand her. he didn’t get time to get happy on her confession. If she loves him then why is she behaving like this?
SHIVAY: Anika! (He again placed his hand on her cheek but she jerked it and got up, wiping her tears with both her palms. She was controlling her expressions and tears. Shivay also got up) What happen Anika? You…you..just said that you love me (he again memorized the moment. The strongest moment of his life when she confessed her feelings. Still he couldn’t believe it that she has actually said that)
Anika was feeling hard to stand over there so she decided to go but Shivay didn’t let her. He held her hand and by slowly walking he stood in front of her. “Why are you doing this to yourself and me?” his eyes were moist and he had a innocence of child on his face.
ANIKA: Why did you do this to me Shivay? (She tried to free her hand but his grip was firm) why was you so nice to me? why did you took care of me? Why did you help me? Why did you become my hope? Why? (she was loud and Shivay was trying to calm her down but she was not listening to him. Her reaction was not expected. She was reacting to much. Something deep and hidden was coming out) You took me out of darkness Shivay…why? Why did you show the world of happiness where I can never go? Shivay……You are soo bad. You are….(And again she started crying. She should not love him. And she shouldn’t have confessed her feelings. She was not a gold digger. How can she ruin his life by becoming a part of it. Shivay looked at her, she was fighting with himself, helplessness was visible in her eyes.)
SHIVAY: I did this because I LOVE YOU. I have also told you before that this is the only statement I know. Nothing matter to me anymore. Your every question will have the same answer from me. which is “Love” Anika. that’s it! Its simple.
ANIKA: No Shivay its not that simple. I am so guilty and worse right now. I am no one to confess in front of you. You are the brightest star and I don’t even have the permission to look up. YOU DON’T DESERVE ME SHIVAY….(Shivay wrinkled his forehead on this line. What the hell was she saying? Who else can be better than her for him) You deserve someone pure and someone good. I am not worth your love. Don’t you know what happened to me? (He came forward and placed his hand on her mouth. What the hell was she thinking? Why is she insecure and guilty? It’s not a crime to love someone. He cannot hear that incident again from her mouth. It only brings out pain, nothing else. How can she even think like this?)
SHIVAY: How can you think so low about self? Han? You are my Anika! the most precious person in the world. I don’t care what happened to you. I told you to forget it. Whatever you are thinking is just rubbish! (His hand was still on her mouth) You are thinking of everything but the only thing which you are ignoring is my love towards you. How can you be so selfish Anika? What happened to you? Hare I am standing in front of you, ready to give my whole life and you are rejecting me again. Just because your stupid mind thinks that you are not good enough for me. What made you think that? Han?
Few seconds passed and he gently removed his hand from her mouth. “Don’t feel guilty for loving me Anika” he came a little towards her and said it in a pleading whisper. “I am lucky that a girl like you loves me but please don’t degrade your love Anika. Confess it, confess it with pride. Like I do” he smiled by looking at her but she was not convinced. Her past was haunting and it never allowed her to escape into the happiness. She was not worried about herself, she was worried about him.
ANIKA: So you means that you are not affected by my past. The fact that I am not pure anymore. The fact that I am like a used product right now. Shivay Singh Oboroi…who is known for his class and taste can settle for something so low. (She was in a situation of self-destruction)
Shivay signaled her to stop. He was dead serious. His eyes getting red and his blue orbs turning dark. He cannot handle her humiliation, even if was done by herself. Anika got quiet by looking at his seriousness. “You will not say this again Anika! you understand?”
Anika looked at his hands which were clenched in a fist. Surely this sentence must have hurt him. “You are my Anika and my Anika is a gem. You understand?” by forgetting his anger he gently placed both his hands on her shoulders and Anika unknowingly moved her head in approval.
SHIVAY: I was not marrying Malika. She is Sidharth’s fiancé and was just helping me to make you confess your love for me but hare you are punishing yourself for a sin you never committed. I really feel like throwing you into this pool. (He signaled towards his pool and Anika widened her eyes by looking at it. Her eyes still had tear drops and Shivay felt like scoping her tight in his arms. He wanted to protect her. he wanted to ensure her that now nothing bad will happen. She was so afraid of happiness and this saddens him.
“But Shivay….you and me” (She was cut by him)
SHIVAY: I know again you will tell me your stupid baseless doubts and I don’t want to hear any of them okay? “you and me” is the best. (he moved a little and joined his head with her forehead and closed his eyes) It’s a small life Anika…so lets just live it. Let’s forget about the past. It will never haunt you, I promise. (He entangled his small finger with hers) Don’t be afraid of the happiness. Let it enter into your life. Don’t be afraid of your love. Just accept it. Just give a chance Anika. I will fix everything. I lost you few years ago and now I seriously don’t have the courage to lose you again. This time if you will go away from my life, I swear I”ll die and…(Anika placed her hand on his mouth. Both were still joining their foreheads and tears were rolling down from both sides. Anika has no other excuse left. She loves him and he loves her back. Yes, she was afraid of many things but this guy who is crying holding her hand will fix everything. How can she hurt him again? How can she leave him again? He has suffered allot for her and now she cannot make him suffer anymore.)
Shivay opened his eyes and looked at her face. It has been a long argument but in the end, he thinks that probably he has won the argument. A smile appeared on his face and took a step back. Anika opened her eyes and he gave her an assuring smile. “From now…. There shouldn’t be any fear or guilt” by saying this he took her hand and slowly pushed her towards him. She closed her eyes again when he encircled his arms around her. his embrace was so protective and secure. In that moment Anika forget all her fears and guilts. It was just him, her love, her friend, her Shivay.
“Bhaiya! Can we enter? We are all dying outside” they both opened their eyes by listening to this very familiar voice. It was surely Rudra. But not just only Rudra. Malika and Sidharth told everyone about that incident and misunderstanding with Anika and now just before few minutes they all were standing outside Shivay’s room waiting for some news to come out.
OMKARA: Rudra! Shut up…don’t disturb them (He gave a small on Rudra’s head)
RUDRA: But O Its been ages that we are standing hare. I am dying with curiosity.
Shivay opened the door and saw the whole army standing there looking at him with questioning eyes. He looked at all of them in disbelief. “Can I get some privacy hare” he asked all of them. Just then Anika popped her head from behind his shoulder and a small shy smile on her face was making it clear that things are probably sorted out now.
“Uhmmm…uhm..Anika! I think you should go and take some rest” Shivay moved towards her and said that. She was looking down, don’t know why but she was feeling so shy because she knew that everyone was looking at her. Malika was also there and before going Anika went towards her. she was about to say sorry to Mlika when Malika nodded her head in no and by coming forward hugged her. “You were just concerned for Shivay that’s it” she tapped her shoulder while hugging. The moment Anika left from there, everyone attacked Shivay with questions. His room was full and after few explanations everyone was happy that at least Anika admitted her love.
SIDHARTH: Thank God! Otherwise I was afraid that I had to hold the hoarse reign in Malika’s wedding. What a nightmare it is (Malika gave him a small smack on his shoulder) Awww….I LOVE YOU TOOO…. (He hugged her and winked at Shivay)
OMKARA: I am soo happy for you today. Look at your face….you are so happy that you can’t help your extra-large smile (Both Omkara and Rudra hugged him)
When everyone left after a hectic day both Shivay and Anika laid on their beds thinking about each other.
“Where are you going?” He saw her standing near the car and questioned her. it the first conversation they were having after yesterday’s night.
ANIKA: Orphanage…(Shivay’s eyes got filled with fear. Is she leaving the house. Wasn’t she fully convinced. Does she still have doubts?.Anika sensed this and cleared his thoughts) Don’t worry Shivay…I am not leaving. Today is the birth day of orphanage so I am going there to celebrate.
SHIVAY: Orphanage’s birthday? What does it mean?
ANIKA: All the kids over there celebrate their on a same day so….i am going there too.
SHIVAY: O that’s great…hmmm…ok so, yeah! You should go then. I’ll see you later. (He gave her a side hug and walked away. Anika was expecting him to offer her a ride but probably he was busy. She looked at Shivay entering in the house back and then she also left.
All the kids were playing with her. Mother Ria noticed a certain kind of satisfaction and happiness on Anika’s face which gave her allot of happiness. She had seen Anika breaking down and now today was a whole new Anika standing in front of her. “God bless you Shivay” mother Ria gave him a silent pray.
Anika was standing with Mother Ria when she heard allot of laughter and noises and music coming from the main hall where all the kids were celebrating. When she reached there she saw the most beautiful people in the world chatting, dancing and playing with the kids. They all were hare leaving all their important meetings and works. Gauri was Dancing, Omkara was painting on a kid face, Rudra was lifting up kids like dumbbells, Sidharth was blind folded and Mlika and some other kids were playing with him and then she saw Shivay holding a small disable girl high is his arms. She was laughing and giggling and Shivay was spinning her around. Her eyes got moistened. So that’s why Shivay didn’t offered her to drop her. this man never fails to amaze her.
“The luckiest girl in the world is you Anika” she silently told this to herself.
Precap : Anika proposes Shivay. Everyone goes out for shopping.
HELLOWWWW…. PEOPLE
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