Sometimes you distance yourself from someone….
Just for their own good.
Once we were out of the house Karthik locked the house and caught hold of my hand. It was unusual and a very good feeling. To hold hands like before. I could feel the butterflies in the pit of my stomach. Karthik was causing me to blush everytime we touched or even looked at each other. It was like relieving the first few days of our relationship all over again.
I expected him to get into his car but he didn’t. Instead he walked past it and lead me to his bike.There was no way I was going home on that. Neither was he. I backed out immediately.
“We are not going on that.” I stated.
“What ?!! But why ?!! I bought this one last week. I haven’t even taken a proper ride. Besides I wanted to take you with me.” Said Karthik. I rolled my eyes.
“No. Try to remember the last time we went on a bike ride together. I almost lost you, Karthik. That day you promised me that you would never ride a bike again. Then what is this ?!!” I was annoyed.
He sighed. “I know jaan. But that was just an accident. okay ?!! I was a careless teen back then. I promise I ll be careful this time.” He assured. I couldn’t buy it anyway.
“Its not about being careful. Its just, I dont know. I can’t forget that incident.” I said. I was too restless even to stand in a place. But Karthik caught a hold of me, grabbing me by my shoulders.
“Calm down Naira. That was two years ago. We are gonna be fine. Do you trust me ?!!” He asked.
“I do but..” I tried saying.
“Then its final. No buts. We are going on a ride. Now c’mon !!” He cut me off and hopped on the bike. My hands were as cold as ice. My whole body was numb as I debated whether I should join him or not. I had to. Still unsure, I sat beside him. My arms wrapped behind his back as I clutched on him tight.
“You better hold on tight babe. You are gonna have fun !!” He said putting on the helmet.
“I don’t think so.” I muttered barely above the whisper as he started the engine.
I just closed my eyes and buried my face in his shoulders. Soon we picked up speed and touched the highway. I could feel the wind on my face. It was so cold outside due to the sudden shower. I shivered and somehow dared to open my eyes. The road was empty. The sky was dark. I could feel the fresh air on my face. The smell of the wet soil. I was finding myself relaxing. Slowly, I let go of Karthik and spread my arms wide open. I felt like a free bird. It wasn’t as bad and scary as I had assumed. I shook my head and laughed at how silly I was, getting scared for no reason. Just like he had said Karthik dropped me outside my home safely. I got down with a smile on my face.
“How was it ?!!” He asked taking off his helmet.
“Not bad. I had fun.” I said.
“Told you. You should start listening to me now.” He chuckled.
“Whatever.Go now.” I said and headed inside when he grabbed my hand and spun me around. He planted a soft peck on my cheek which sent shivers down my spine. I flushed deep red.
“What are you doing ?!! Someone might see us.” I whispered trying to get out of his grip. But he only pulled me closer.
“I don’t care.” He said while I was smiling like a love struck teenager.
“There are people here, who know us. You just can’t kiss me like that in public.” I said.
“Am I allowed to do so in private ?!!” He asked innocently. But I knew he was already imagining scenarios in his little devil mind. I let out a giggle and nodded.
“Mendhak, please let me go.” I pleaded.
“I want my kiss first.” He said.
“You want it here ?!! In front of everyone ?!!” I asked, amused. He nodded at my question.
“No just go. Before anyone recognises you.” I laughed.
“But that’s not fair.” He protested.
“But everything is fair in love. Now go !!” I ushered him off. He narrowed his eyes and threw a look full of attitude.
“Whatever. Don’t call me later to say how much you miss me.” He huffed, putting his helmet on. He was so cute when he was angry. I couldn’t help but laugh.
“I love you.” I said. He shook his head with a smile.
“I hate you.” He said before starting his engine and taking a u-turn to his house. As I was about to head inside, I heard him call my name again from a distance.
“Naira. I love you too !!” He yelled, waving back at me. He was looking at me and not at the road ahead. I smiled and waved back at him. That’s when I noticed a car speeding in his direction.
“Karthik !!” I yelled causing him to look ahead. He was alarmed but before he could hit the brake or change the direction he was hit by the car from the side. A screeching sound filled my ears followed by a loud bang.
It took me a while to process what had happened. He had met with an accident. He was hit by a car. My heart had stopped beating for a split second as I ran across the road to him. A crowd gathered around him as he laid on the road, lifeless and bleeding.
I pushed away the people and crouched down next to him. I put his head on my lap trying to wake him up. My heart was beating at an abnormal pace.
“Karthik ?!! Can you hear me ?!! Please wake up.” I cried in a horribly cracking voice as I shook him frantically. He wasn’t responding. He just lied unconscious in my arms. I had to get help.
“Call an ambulance.Please someone ?!!” I pleaded. I cried a river as someone from the crowd called up an ambulance.Karthik was soon rushed to the hospital.
I sat on one of those little hospital chairs ,waiting for an update on Karthik . I couldn’t stop my tears. I was still shivering at the memory of the accident. A male voice snapped me out of my thoughts.
“Miss ?!!” I looked up to see a doctor.
“How is he ?!!” I asked.
“He’s fine. Just a few bruises here and there. But he has a hairline fracture in his left wrist. He needs to rest for a couple of weeks to be okay. Thankfully he was wearing a helmet or else it could have been a serious head injury.” The doctor said.
I heaved a sigh of relief. My pacing heart seemed to calm down a little. Hearing that he was fine was like giving water to a lost man in a desert. I sunk back on the seat.
“He ll be okay miss. You can meet him in the evening. He’s still unconscious due to anaesthesia.” He informed me and left.
All I could do was to curse myself. It was all my fault. I was a fool to come back into his life. I was selfish to see nothing beyond my happiness. How could I break my promise and put his life in danger ?!!
I closed my eyes and went back to the day when all of it happened for the very first time. The day when I chose to leave him, two years ago. . . . . .
“Karthik. Can you go a little slower ?!! You are already touching hundred !!” I exclaimed over the howling wind. I knew he barely heard me.
“But I am already going slow for you. .” He answered in the same tone.
“No !! Just slow down more.” I said. But alas. The speed increased every minute.
“Okay baba. I will take a u-turn once we reach 120.” He said. I pulled a little away from him to look at the road ahead. It looked beautiful. Greenery everywhere. That was the first time I had dared to look up from his back.
“You looked !!” He chuckled and tilted his head a little to meet his eyes with mine.
“Shut up. Just look ahead !!” I said, still scared. Just as he was about to say something my eyes landed on a car speeding towards us from the opposite direction.
“Watch out !!” I exclaimed and shut my eyes in fear. Within moments we had skid down the road with a thud.
I could hear no sound. My vision was hazy as I felt the hard and rocky ground beneath me. A sharp killing pain shot through my arm. I had no clue what was going on. All I knew was that, we were hit. I tried to get up. But failed at every attempt. The pain was too much to bear. My mind thought of only one person, Karthik. My eyelids began to drop as I found myself falling into a deep slumber.
I woke up to a beeping sound. It was an IV monitor. I gazed at the very unfamiliar surroundings ,the white walls, a little couch and a small window across the room. I tried to get up but I couldn’t. My hand was put up in a cast and I was hooked to many machines. I was in a hospital.
My eyes landed on mumma sitting beside me, smiling at me. She had tears in her eyes though. The memories of the accident came flooding to my mind. The first person that crossed my mind was Karthik. where was he ?!!
“Thank god you are okay, Naira. How are you feeling ?!!” Mumma asked scooping me in her arms.
“Not so good.” I answered. “Where is he ?!! Where is Karthik ?!!” I asked. She just looked too worried. Like she didn’t have an answer to my question. I on the other hand was tearing up because of her silence.
“Mumma ?!! Where is he ?!! I want to meet him.” I cried. I had lost my voice. I sounded horrible. But unfortunately I didn’t get any answer to my question. Various inappropriate thoughts crossed my mind.Where was he ?!! Was he okay ?!! Why is he not with me ?!!
Before I could interrogate more the door of the room cracked open revealing a man in his late 30s. Along with him came papa.He smiled at me before checking some papers clipped to his writing pad.
“Miss Naira.Its good to see you awake !! How are you feeling ?!!” He asked in a husky voice.
“Not good. Not unless you tell me how my friend is. Where is he ?!!” I demanded to know.
“You need to take some rest young lady. You can meet your friend later.” He said. How was I gonna take rest when I had no clue where and how Karthik was ?!!
“To hell with that !! I want to know where he is. I want to meet him !!” I cried. The doctor sighed and looked at papa. I swapped hopeful gazes between the two. Mumma and papa gave him a little nod, approving my request.
“Okay. You can see him.” He sighed. “But he’s still unconscious. If he doesn’t wake up in the next couple of hours, I m afraid he will go into coma.” He said.
My heart dropped into the pit of my stomach. I felt dizzy hearing the words like coma for the first time because it was now related to Karthik. I was escorted to the room where Karthik was admitted. He was in the ICU. His mother who paced in the corridor hugged me tight. She too was in tears.
“Do you need me inside ?!!” Papa asked. I shook my head. I wanted to go alone. I wanted some moments with him . . . alone. I opened the door and walked in.
There he was. Lying on the cold bed, unconscious and lifeless. He had a leg in the cast and a bandaid on his head. He always looked so peaceful when he slept. But at that moment he looked lifeless and pale. I took a seat beside him. I couldn’t hold back anymore as I clutched his hand.
“Please wake up mendhak. I miss you. I can’t believe what just happened. But I want you back. With me, in my arms, loving me again. Me, your mom all of us are dying to see you awake. Please come back.” I cried. I don’t know whether he could hear me or not but he was showing no signs of improvement.
“Please just come back. I know how much you like to surprise people. So why don’t you open those beautiful eyes of yours and surprise us all.Cause outside they are all saying that you won’t wake up anytime soon. But they are wrong, right ?!! You are here with me.” I cried. At that time, I was ready to trade anything to bring him back to life.
I never believed much in God. But that day, I was helpless. I was no magician to make all his pain to go away. All I could do is pray for him. And thus, I did.
’Please God. Please help me out. I love him. Please save him. I promise to trade anything for it. I ll never meet him again. I ll go away from his life forever. Just give him his life back and I ll stay true to my words.’
This was my vow. The vow which held me back. This was our destiny.I had my fingers crossed. I was clutching onto him tight. My eyes were still closed shut, as tears rolled down from them. Just then a miracle had taken place, I heard his voice. At first, I shook it off as a hallucination. But then he called my name again.
“Naira ” Just listening to his voice again calmed me down. I was relieved. I opened my eyes to be blurred by the tears. He gently wiped them off with his thumb. “Are you okay ?!!” He asked me in his drowsy voice. I nodded and smiled at him.
“Yes, we are okay.” I assured. His gaze shifted to the plaster in my hand. “Your hand.Is it okay ?!! I m sorry jaan. Its all my fault. I shouldn’t have taken you out. I feel terrible ” He said. He was getting too worked up. I had to calm him down.
“No Karthik. Its not your fault. Forget the past, okay ?!! You are fine. You ll be fine. I promise.” I said stroking his hair. He sighed and closed his eyes shut.
“I don’t know what to say. I feel terrible. I m sorry. ” He said.
“Shh. Don’t be. Don’t stress yourself so much. You need rest. I should leave now.” I said. It had already dawned upon me that THIS WAS THE BEGINNING OF THE END OF OUR RELATIONSHIP. I had to stay true to my words and let him go. Unwillingly I untangled my hand from his and rose to my feet.
“You ll be back, right ?!!” He asked hopefully. I smiled.
“Yes.” I said.
My last word was a big fat lie. I didn’t go back to him. I didn’t visit him till he was healed completely. And when I did, it was only to officially break all ties.
I opened my eyes. I had a blurred vision due to my tears. I knew that this accident was some kind of warning. It meant, I couldn’t break my promise again.
I had to confront him and end this once and for all. For the sake of his life. Our lives were connected and so were our destinies, if something happened to him, I couldn’t imagine myself living in this world either…
Precap : Naira telling Karthik about her vow. what will be karthik’s reaction ?!!
She leaves him, because she loves him. .
This I guess was one of the most heart wrenching update I have ever written.So yeah the reason for their break up was inspired from one of my fav movies jab tak hai jaan. I also want to tell you all that the story would be completely different from the movie. Karthik will do nothing like SRK did in the movie nor will Naira. Only this one thing (the reason for seperation) has been taken from Jab tak hai jaan !!
Don’t be angry on me please and have some faith. Kaira millan coming soon. Just want the story to be more realistic so its taking it a bit time !!
Do tell me how was it ?!! Keep smiling. Keep watching Yrkkh.