SWASAN: If this is your love, my Prince… Then, please hate me! [Episode 4]

Manheshwari Mansion seems like a devastated land after a big storm, the wide rooms, the long corridors, the flourished gardens around… silence and darkness has turned the familiar sanctuary in a big soulless stone built house.
When night comes, everyone retired in his room. Lights switched off, they lay on their beds restless, staring pensively to the sailing and recalling the last days events… today’s events.
They’re waiting for the sun to rise bringing a new day, may be Durga Prasad’s decision will bring some light to their lives again.
From tomorrow on, everything will return to normal, no mourning signs at home, returning to work and acting like the old adage says “life must continue…”
Sitting on the balancing chair, the old man is looking to his family photo’s album recalling all the beautiful moments they lived before the awful last months. Searching in his memories what would be the mistake which made his beautiful family shattered…
When his silent phone vibrates, he looks to Annapurna who is acting like she’s sleeping and goes out to the balcony to pick it up.
***

Swara opens her eyes startled, her heart pounding in her chest, her face drowned with tears and sweat… she’s scared feeling lost, she looks around searching and is surprised to find Ragini fallen asleep sitting next to her on the bed. She sits in her place wiping her face and eyes with her hands and putting her hair behind her ears. Then, looking again to Ragini, she feels bad for her guessing how uncomfortable was her position like that. She presses her hand making her wake.
“- Swara!?”…
Ragini sits strait immediately checking on her sister’s fever a hand on her forehead and cheeks.
“- kya hua, Swara? You’re ok?… you need…”
Swara takes her hands in hers and says with a small voice reassuring:
“- Ragini… I’m ok…”
Her sister is already trying to stand up but she stops her:
“- Ragini, go to your room and take some rest”
Ragini frowns and replies:
“- Nahi Swara… I’m fine, I’m just going to bring you…”
“- Ragini, I’m ok… I don’t need anything…”
Ragini tries to argue with her, but Swara caresses her cheek making her look in her full of tears eyes and supplies her:
“- Please Ragini… don’t make me feel guilty for you too…”
Crying, Ragini takes her in arms hugging her tightly feeling helpless, but Swara doesn’t hug her back, she swallows her tears refusing to break down. Breaking their embrace she asks her again:
“- Ragini… I’m really ok… I took my medicines, na?… please, I need to be alone… please?”
*-*-*

At badi, Sharmista cries badly sitting on the bed and thinking about Swara and Sanskar, she remembers how lovely he has always been with her and how much he respected them even when Swara and him were having problems.
Shekar presses her shoulder in comfort trying to console her, he says:
“- We have to be strong Mishti, Swara needs us to be strong…”
“- Shekar, how do you want me to be strong, mera Shona is there alone living hell on earth…”
“- She’s not alone, they’re all there with her… Didn’t you read Sanskar’s letter?”
“- KYA LETTER SHEKAR, kya letter!!!???… What was that?… blaming himself, making her his heiress… I mean, it’s so… how could Sanskar do that?”
Sharmista was both sad and angry… she can’t understand what’s happening and her worry for Swara’s state was putting her nerves on fire.
“- Mishti, Sanskar has always done that, he always did all his possible for her happiness…”
“- EXACTLY!”
Sharmista stands up not bearing to stay in a place, she makes some steps absent minded and adds:
“- Exactly Shekar… Sanskar has never harmed Swara intentionally… so how could he do that? Is he making her happy now?… you’ve seen her… is it that making her happy?… and his poor family, he has always been such a lovely and perfect son then…”

Shekar wraps his arms around her from her back hugging her tightly and says:
“- Mishti, what has happened, has happened… we can’t change it but…”
At that moment someone knocked on her door, Sharmista exclaims:
“- who can come to see us at this late time?”
While she goes to open, Shekar picks up his silently ringing phone and goes to the kitchen to talk, he hears her surprised:
“- Ma!!!”
“- I’ll not talk to you Shumi, how can you hide all what had happened to my Swara?”
The anger on the old woman’s face and tone melts at the first tears of her daughter; she takes her in her arms crying and says:
“- Ma!… if only you know all that we have lived the past days…”
Shobha caresses her hair tenderly having an eloquent look to her son in law who came back to their… a baby cry makes her smile… she was eager to see little Ayush.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Ragini enters her room and sits on the bed’s corner landing her head on its poster, she was physically and emotionally exhausted. Looking to Laksh who was turning his back to her, she knew perfectly that he’s awake but as usual, he’ll keep quite asking her to let him alone.
Feeling armless, not finding a way to make things better, she goes to the balcony smelling the night’s scents her thoughts flowing on the last days happenings, the last months events and to those days when they used to be happy, tears flows from her eyes thinking about the sweet moments Swaragini teases joyfully Sanlack as they kept calling them… how to accept that those days will never come again.
“- How is she, Ragini?”

Laksh voice startles her in her back, she looks back to him, tiredness and sorrow ravaging his lovely face, he turns away from her inquiring gaze making her look outside again. She replies on a sad tone:
“- How would she be, Laksh?… she’s agonizing… who knows her feelings more than me, hai na?”
Laksh knows that Ragini was referring to the whole drama she lived about him some weeks ago when doctor had announced to her that he was dead. Guiltiness was killing him from inside, never in his worst nightmares he would thought that the decision he took more than six months ago would have such consequences… he bends his head and turns away tears running over his bearded cheeks.
Surprisingly, he feels Ragini’s hand on his, holding him back… he stops closing his eyes not looking to her but she faces him, caressing his face to make him look into her eyes…
“- Ragini… I’m…”
She shuts him a finger on his lips and landing her head on his chest, she wraps her arms around his waist hugging him tightly, she closes her eyes and says:
“- nahi, I AM SORRY Laksh… I didn’t want to blame you… I’m just worrying about my sister”
Wrapping his arms around her too, he holds her with all his forces crying and says:
“- you’re right… to worry about her… she’s your sister… never be like me… my… my brother kept helping me… protecting me… worrying about me… and what I did?”
Ragini takes his face in her hands trying to console him, she wipes his eyes with her hands, then looking back to his chest, she caresses the circular injury mark the three undone first buttons of his shirt shows, feeling her heart sinks at the memory of its cause.
*-*-*

Sitting on the shower cabin’s marbled floor, drowned by the hot water flows, Swara doesn’t know how long time she has spent here crying loudly like a little girl hiding from the whole world around.
This world out who wants her to be strong, to be fine, to accept what seems obvious… Sanskar, her friend, her love, her husband, her prince… the confident, the reason of her heart’s beats, the proud of her life and the man who makes her feel like a real princess…
HER Sanskar has succeeded fulfilling his promises to her like he always done, he found his brother, he gathered his family and brought the smile and happiness to her sister’s life… he proved her again what he has always been from the first moment she saw his real face, that moment when his blood has been spread on her saving her life from death even being on the dark side of the truth, even engaged in a heartless and blindness revenge against the most close persons of his life, even destructing her life in this path… he was there, above her helpless weak body offered as kurbaan to a devil witch, he was there stopping death from taking her as her closest person’s wishes…
What has been her life before? She can’t remember… it seems like her world started turning on that night when he opened his heart to her so she took off all its blackness…
Then from her jallad he became her savior knight… branding his white handkerchief to wipe silently her tears, his wide chest to handle her heavy with sadness heart giving her head a landing safe area… branding his force and his anger to protect her from any potential harm…
For long months, he faces her indifference with unconditional love, her heartless decisions to let him with patience and comprehension, her reject with an extended reassuring hand brushing her tears away again…
her tears now are hidden under the flowing waters pressing her shaken body like memories and pressing her shaken soul…

Memories of the stranger man who shared with her the same closed doors room and the reduced space in a tent for long days and nights respectfully going so far in his process to protect and help her so he lied swearing on gods…
Memories of the forced and unwanted husband whose heart was bleeding face to her ignorance but kept standing by her side against the whole world even after he claimed their friendship over…
Memories of the angry ex-husband who left his first love for her even after he put an engagement ring on her finger in front of the whole world…
Memories of the prince who stirred heaven and earth to prove his princess’ innocence when her castle turned to be jail…
Memories of her pathi who asked her to not break her father’s wishes and consoled her patiently on their official suhagrat night when her heart stayed back at her parent’s home…
Memories of her loving husband who made everyday like a new chapter in a fairytale where she’s heroine and he’s her prince, knight, servant…

Memories of her falling in the river again, his desperate face when she escaped his rescuing hand, his unconditional support even faced with accusing words and his concessions playing a diverting guy to spend time with her and see her smile back… his willing forgiveness for the awful moments she made him live until her memory was back and again his prince saves her…
Memories of his understanding at hospital when she confesses that she has deliberately injured herself searching her little brother, of his standing by her side whatever she did even if it seems wrong…
Memories of his calmness force facing his brother’s issue while making all his possible to earn money properly, protect his brother and save his family without forgetting about her… always finding a way to bring a smile on her face in the worst moments…
Then things turned a bad way, for the first time it seems like badness has won over goodness… betrayal evinced the truth… and her prince turned to be her jallad again!
Her blurred vision looks to her burned hand, she has refused to let her sister put a bandage on it… is it hurting? To this worried question from Ragini she couldn’t find a reply… the hurt feeling is wrapping all her being… this tiny marks can’t be more hurtful that what her heart was suffering form!… she details the bangels shining with water drops recalling the first time he offered them to her, with a coupled roses of her favorite color… the second time on that special night he made her “his” finally like he whispered in her ear…

And that last time…
She recalls every moment, every word, every touch, every look… again… again… again… like an old black and white film… again… again… again…
Closing her eyes, she screams with wrath crying more, the unwelcome image of the stretcher behind the ambulance closing doors… Laksh’s words… the whole mad situation when she opened her eyes today… THE LETTER!!!
Suddenly, refusing to recall those unbearable words, she wipes her face and switches off the water inlet tap, then she wraps a towel around her exhausted body and goes out of the shower glass cabin extending her hand to take the bathrobe hanged out… but she stops breathing feeling a so familiar texture under her drenched fingers tip…
That deep blue T-shirt from what his so virile fragrance was spread yet, she almost chokes taking it from its hanging, her eyes filled with tears again, she hugs it closing them and smelling the turning heads so particular perfume of her Sanskar …

*** FLASHBACK ***
Swara was in the bathroom, she has taken a rapid shower after a long afternoon in the kitchen preparing some traditional sweets for the family. She knows she hasn’t lot of time before Sanskar returns to home and it’s time to make tea.
She wears her skirt hastily and is knotting her choli in her back when something falls on her head covering her face too… from its fragrance, she immediately knows who has stormed in the bathroom without checking because too absorbed by his phone call.
“- No Mr Malhotra, I’ll not wait for another month… ha… I know… I know… ha… now listen to me carefully, I don’t care about all that, all I know is that this deal will be finalized before the end of the week!… ha it’s important… it’s a gift to… eh… Mr Malhotra, I’ll call you back later!”
At the vision of his lovely little wife standing in front of him, her long silky drenched hair falling heavily on her barely covered shoulders, the skin of her belly shining with water drops, her lovely curves shaped in that long skirt… it’s not only the call that he cancelled but all world around.
“- Sanskar Maheshwari! How dare you!?”
he frowns needing some time to realize from her accusing wide eyes’ black irises and her fists on her hips that she’s mad at him… he rises her eyebrows in surprise amused…
“- you find it funny, Mr Maheshwari!?”

He blinks trying to be serious, what would she reproach him? Frowning again, he thinks about the call assuring himself that she couldn’t have understood what he was talking about… may be because he’s shirtless… his Swara is a still shy small thing about… damn it, he can’t concentrate seeing her like that!
“- SANSKAR!!”
Her shout makes him look finally in her eyes asking:
“- what!?”
“- did someone ask you to take me for wife and hanger so you can throw your things on me?”
He blinks again detailing her from head to toe appreciating the half of her sentence… taking her for wife… the best decision in his life…
“- HALLO!!! Houston… someone’s there??”
His wide wild smile makes her realize the situation; she feels blood heads up to her cheeks immediately making her blush to her hair roots… she throws back his t-shirt at his face and turns away to take her sari starting already to fold its extremity between her trembling fingers, she feels him coming closer into her back and her breaths become heavy… his husky suggestive voice caresses her ear:
“- Mrs Maheshwari… I took you for wife and everything… but if about hanger, it’s not really my t-shirt that I would throw on you…”
“- Sanskar…”

Her admonishing tone tries to stop him while she closes her eyes trying to ignore his closeness and continues the becoming difficult task of wrapping her sari around her…
“- kya hua, princess?… you were saying something hai na?… tell me…”
His finger was tracing the edge of her blouse in her bare back playfully making her shiver; she takes a deep breath making a step further away from his reach and replies:
“- no one taught you to knock on doors before entering somewhere?”
“- this is my room… my bathroom and you’re my wife, Mrs Maheshwari! and by the way…”
Extending his arm to the door’s locker, he adds:
“- it wouldn’t happen if… you had… lock… the… door…”
When he locks it portraying his words she turns to him startled and exclaims:
“- Sanskar!”
At that moment, she hears her mother in law shouting from the corridor:
“- SWARA!?…”
“- Oh my god! Mum!!!”
She tries to push him but he just comes closer nipping her against the door… she struggles in his embrace whispering alarmed:
“- Sanskar!… let me go, she’s searching me…”
His hands at both her sides on the door, he was blocking her not allowing her even to continue wearing her sari which she just cover herself putting it on her shoulder.
“- HEY CHOREE!!! Are you here???”
Sujatta was knocking at their room’s door wondering where has her daughter in law disappeared for all this time.
“- Sanskar! Let me go!!!.. Ah…”

She was about shouting to her mum that she’s coming but he silences her a hand on her mouth then bending over her face looking into her surprised big eyes, he goes murmuring in her ear:
“- you should know Mrs Maheshwari… your shameless husband is able to tell her that you’re not available for the moment and will come later… but I think that tea time will be a bit awkward for the three of us”
Her eyes widens with panic, she looks aside to the door, there is some more knocks out but soon, she could hear her mum’s steps walking away blabbering about the younger’s lack of responsibility and wondering where has could be this choree… Sanskar’s devil smile becomes wilder when he says:
“- much better!”
She blinks few times to break the charm he threw on her paralyzing all her senses, then she abruptly pushes on his chest making him back off almost losing his balance but she’s surprised to feel immediately chillness wrapping her!
“- Sanskar!”

Looking to herself, she’s shocked to discover that she was just in small blouse and skirt, the long sari was in his hand, he just laughs back on the opened door of the shower cabin.
Smirking and narrowing her eyes, she bends to the floor to take the sari’s extremity pulling the material from his hand not aware of the appreciative view she’s giving him like that… but at the moment she gets up he pulls it forcefully dragging her to his embrace before she can react…
Collapsing on his bare chest, she looks up to him shocked feeling her lungs out of air…
“- you call yourself my prince, is those gentlemen’s manners Mr Maheshwari?”
Her voice was trembling, trying to hide the feelings he’s awaking deep inside her as his hot breaths are brushing her face so closely, she wets her lips swallowing.
“- kya karo, princess… your prince tries to be a gentleman but your husband is… bewitched by your beauty Mrs Maheshwari!”
The color of his eyes darkens as his hands grips her hips pinning her against him so she could feel his need for her, which making her flush looking away but he pulls on her chin making her look back to him and hovering over her face, he’s about to kiss her when she turns away from him trying to escape her own feelings dragging her toward him dangerously… he stops her.

Feeling his hands caressing her waist above her skirt’s boundaries, making their way above along her sides, her back arcs instinctively in response, her chest raising and downing with short breathings, she closes her eyes when his fingers draws the limits of her blouse in her back, undoing the loosened nod barely sustaining her perfect bust…
“- SWARA!!!”
She opens her eyes startled at her sister’s voice in their room, escaping his grip she discovers that her opened blouse was discovering most of her shoulders, she looks back to his smiling face:
“- Sanskar!… it’s Ragini!”
“- so?”
“- she knows I’m here…”
She tries to explain him the situation trying to tie the nod in her back, he keeps looking to her calmly and replies amused:
“- So?”
“- SWARA? You’re here?”
Ragini’s voice was behind the bathroom door, Swara murmurs :
“- Sanskar! My sari… please…”
At the insisting knocks on the door, he bends to the floor to take the material while she’s trying to adjust her skirt and blouse. She tends her hand to take it from his hand but instead of giving it to her, he drags her into his arms possessively…
“- SWARA?… are you inside?”
She widens her eyes afraid and tries to argue with him but he shuts her putting his finger on her lips and throws the sari inside the shower cabin soaking it on its marbled floor. At her shocked look, he just blows in her ear:
“- just imagine what can I say to you sister, princess!”
Pulling her inside the cabin, he switches on the shower muting the knocks and calls outside and closes the door behind him…
*** END OF FLASHBACK***

To be continued…

Mahira
* Shameless Swasan’s fan club leader *

71 comments

  1. Arshaanya

    |Registered Member

    Wen he’ll comebck yr….
    Shez going tru so much pain… how can sanskar do dis… i guess dere is some otjer reason of his doings… who was calling dp n shekhar 😕😕😕
    Want sanskar bck nw

    • MAHIRA

      |Author

      You guess well dear Arshaanya…
      And just wait, he’s waiting for her for 6 months, she’ll have to wait some more hai na?
      And who said that Sanskar is not here????

  2. Raina

    |Registered Member

    didi!!!!!! at first you made me cry for swara, but then the flashback scene. today you proved that you deserve to be a leader, seriously didi you are sooooo shameless and about the episode, you are a great writer didi, i mean you made me feel almost all the emotions. cry, sad, happy, blush. i can’t wait more, update the next episode fast and finally THE MOST IMPORTANT THING, nothing should happen to sanskar. get that?

    • MAHIRA

      |Author

      arre… i tried to not make poeple cry this time feeling so bad after the Sanskar’s letter :p
      THANK YOU SOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!! i’m blushing till my hair roots like Swara for those beatiful words… i’ll try to write faster for the next episode which will probably makes Sanskar’s entry (not sure, depends on how long will be the update 🙂
      about shamelesseness???.. who? what? don’t know what are you talking about :p
      *bliking innocently*

      • Adishu

        |Registered Member

        innocent… aacha di tell me who will believe you…. after reading this part…. n I really agree with Raina that u really deserve to be our leader……… n we want only u to be the leader of THE SHAMLESS SWASAN FAN CLUB…. n u only agreed it today in the story itself….

    • MAHIRA

      |Author

      a spoiler???
      remember when Swara was in coma and dreamt of Sanskar coming and tell her that she has to come back to the world now, she has spent too much on that bridge???
      Who said that it was a dream?
      i mean, really she was in her bed but….

  3. Adishu

    |Registered Member

    Didi…………..
    what to comment…first u made me cry… u know so many tears were formed in my eyes that I was not able to read …everything was looking blurred till the rubbed my eyes….
    n then came the romance part….u know I completely hide myself under the blanket…. so that no one sees me blushing… it was really good….
    but diii the precap… it was not in this part….
    when will we get next part????

    • MAHIRA

      |Author

      Aditi my sweet chotee… how old are? are you allowed to read things like that???
      And i tried to not make poeple cry this time, but seriously Swara living happilly without him wouldn’t be credible at al na?
      The precap is coming soon… just wait, i’ll post before the next week end^^
      About leading our shameless fan club, i was crowned by Mica for my shameless skills *blinking innocently*
      And uff… i kept myself from writing what happened behind that shower’s cabin door… this is a public plateform yaar!

      • Adishu

        |Registered Member

        OK let’s see… di I tried to give link but it was everytime disappear… so the lyrics…
        F:hmm hmm hmmtum juda ho kar hume aur pyaare ho gaye (2)the kareeb to door the (2)ab hamaare ho gayetum juda ho kar humeM:hey ek ek saans mein yaad ban ke mahekti ho tumhey ho gayi ho khafaa phir bhi mujh mein dhadakti ho tumdhoondhta hai hume pyaar ka raasta aaj bhiaa rahi hai yehi dhadkanon se sadaa aaj bhitum juda ho kar hume aur pyaare ho gaye (2)the kareeb to door the ab hamaare ho gayetum juda ho kar humeF:ho door ho to lagaa meri aankhon ki tumpyaas theho tha pataa yeh kahaan tum mere is kadar paas thedarr nahin raat ka meri palkon pe jugnu to haisaath ab tum nahin mere saathi yeh aansoo to haitum juda ho kar hume aur pyaare ho gaye (2)the kareeb to door the ab hamaare ho gayetum juda ho kar humeM:hey kya kahe kis taraah toot kar reh gayi har kasamhey waqt ka hai sitam bewafaa the na tumaur na humkya khabar thi hume pyaar mein hongi majboorianjitne hum the kareeb utni nazdeeq thi dooriyan (2)

      • MAHIRA

        |Author

        I found the song on youtube… and you know what? i’m crying like a fool…
        Oh yes it sweets perfectly those episodes and Swara’s pain without him (surely, hidden pain of Sanskar without her too…)

    • MAHIRA

      |Author

      i’ll probably post of the week end as usual , but already writting … next chapter is very imprtant as it shows a new Swara… and MORE…
      i posted a new FF too, just intro, will write it slowly 🙂

  4. Adishu

    |Registered Member

    do u know when I read this… u know the feeling which I get is that…. that sanskar is acting…. this suicide drama is planed one… n that sanskar is continusly watching swara…. keeping a watch on her….seeing her everytime….
    I don’t know if it is going to happen in story or not but the just feel that…..
    enjoy the song n listen it also…………..

    • MAHIRA

      |Author

      hum…
      remember what he told her about drinking?… he passed the 6 months back watching and spying on her like a mad man all the night long when she’s sleeping in her parent’s home and that he knwos she never finishes her meals, that she cries for long nights alone…
      SO.. if he’s still alive………………

      • MAHIRA

        |Author

        Oh God!!!! you’re not allowed to go up to bedrooms in Maheshwari Mansion, just take tchai in salon and play outside with paper planes with Ayush :p:p

      • Adishu

        |Registered Member

        first I don’t like paper planes… n then tell me what’s mica ,Raina, urs,n every shameless swasan fan… then if I didn’t find anyone of my age ur younger to me then I’ll not read it… but if I found (which I know I will get easily )then u have to play with paper planes :p :p…

      • MAHIRA

        |Author

        hehe… i used to play with paper planes loooong times ago :p
        and till here you can read… but i’ll have to be carefull, cause this is absolutely not the shamelessEST i can write… and the story is just in the begining :p:p

  5. Kakali

    |Registered Member

    Shameless SWASAN.. urgh how could they be sooo adorable n tempting… gosh i melt like Ammul butter for their intensity… uhh Mahira Diii… breathtaking chappy… loved it sooo much..
    Thnk u.. ;-*

  6. Mica

    |Registered Member

    what what what is that ? you waking up the devil inside me then….. to be continue ??????
    you shameless..but instead of that.. you bad tooo very very very bad..
    you killed this chapter in the peak point..huh!
    gooooooooosshhh shameless Sanskar, love it

    • MAHIRA

      |Author

      Dearest chote behen mica
      How to say it? Going inside the shower cabin is not allowed for all sweety.. Can continue the “to be continued” part but just in private messages or I’ll finish banned from TU forever :p
      About our lovely shameless sanskar I just love it when switch off his cuteness letting the whole place for pure hotness…. And he’s just too good in that

  7. Chanu

    |Registered Member

    Di…
    omg jst nw I read da whole part..
    hawww..
    *hiding behind the bath tub.. 😉 😛
    see im bcm a tomato after reading dis..
    awww.. I lv dis swasan and miss them.. huhuhuh 🙁
    lv ya di..
    waiting 4 my sanku..
    lv you soo much.
    bye bye
    ummmah

  8. Prashasti7

    |Registered Member

    Wow Dii awsm episode so beautifully written. Living without the person whom we love the most is sooo much difficult and u r showing this emotion very beautifully I love the way u describe every emotion through Ur words which seems soo real that we instantly start feeling the emotions as ours n now m clear that my sansku is alive eagerly waiting for his entry love u Dii n plz post soon

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