This chapter is dedicated to all my silent readers….. if you find it interesting then please do comment…. I am waiting…. No more silence now it’s time to speak….
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Precap: heated argument between Swara and Sanskar and he raised his hand on Swara.
Its 1 am now…. Maheshwari mansion was silent. Sanskar was tossing on the bed, trying hard to sleep but failed. Her words were still echoing in his ears. Irritated with all this, he stood up from the bed and moved to the balcony of the room. He sat there on the couch, lit a cigarette and started smoking, though he wasn’t a regular smoker, he does only when he is frustrated and today was the day. He was reminiscing all what happened tonight. Angrily he crushed the cigarette and threw it away.
Since last half an hour I was trying to sleep but unfortunately I couldn’t. I swear, I didn’t want to think about her but she captured my mind fully. It was irritating so, I gave up on sleep and moved to the balcony and sat there. I didn’t know on whom I was angry, on her or on me? Why she was bothering me so much? Why it pained me when I saw tears in her eyes? Why I felt that somebody stabbed me when that Kunal touched her? God! This girl will make me crazy some day. I can’t believe I raised my hand on her. What she must be thinking of me? But it wasn’t my fault, she instigated me. How could she use such words for herself? She really thinks of me so low? “Here I am fighting for her like an insane lover and she is busy in accusing me for the sin which I have never committed”. I was lost in my own world when a knock on the door brought me back.
Hearing a knock on the door, he stood up from the couch and moved towards the door wondering who could be there at this time of night. He opened the door and Annapurna was standing there. He gave a surprised look to her.
Sanskar: mom!! What happened? You are still awake? Is Siya fine, she was with you na?
Annapurna: (putting a hand on his shoulder) Sanskar, I and Siya both are fine. She is sleeping peacefully in my room. I came here to ask about Swara. Siya told me what all happened in the party. Before coming to your room, I went to her room but the door was closed. I think she must be sleeping as I knocked the door few times but she didn’t reply.
Sanskar: (serious look) come inside mom, I will answer all your questions.
She came inside and sat on the bed, Sanskar sat beside her.
Sanskar: Mom, you remember Mr. Raman Dixit, dad’s friend?
Annapurna: (nodded) yeah, owner of Shiva Industries.
Sanskar: yes mom, his son Kunal Dixit misbehaved with Swara in the party. But I handled the situation and taught a good lesson to that shameless man.
Flashes of Kunal again irked him. Annapurna was feeling disgusted towards that man.
Annapurna: (angrily) how can he do that to her? If am not wrong he is married, still having a bad eye on other girl. Shameless creature…. People like him should be jailed.
Sanskar: I know mom, for the crime he has committed he should be behind bars but it’s not only about him, it’s also about Swara. If we will take any kind of legal action against him, Swara has to suffer the more. All this will malign her name.
Annapurna: yeah, you are right. I am really feeling bad for that poor girl. The girl who must have been brought up as a princess of her house now forced to face all the hardship after her father’s death. She is too young to bear all that. Being a woman I can understand how she must be feeling right now. At this situation she needed a shoulder to cry on, comforting words to soothe her pain. Surely she will be missing her mother right now, that’s why I went to her room but sadly couldn’t meet her.
Sanskar was listening to her patiently. Annapurna took a deep sigh and patted Sanskar’s cheek and said.
Annapurna: (proud smile) am happy my son, you helped her and made her feel little comfortable because she terribly needed someone’s support today. God bless you my child.
Giving a satisfactory smile to Sanskar, she left from there unaware that her words ignited a new battle inside him.
Sanskar: (in his mind) was it my fault? The way I behaved with her was wrong? Yeah man! You were wrong, your behavior was wrong (a voice came from his heart).
He was confused. The battle is going between his heart and his mind. And eventually heart won over mind. Now he was feeling guilty.
She was standing near the window silently holding her father’s picture looking outside. Her eyes were red due to continuous crying, cheeks were showing the marks of dried tears. She looked at her father’s picture and started talking to it.
Swara: (with pain) baba why you left me? See how people are treating your princess… I can’t fight anymore, I don’t want to be strong now…. I want you to stand by my side, to protect me, to take care of me, ma and ashu… please come back baba, come back…
She broke down and started crying again.
Mom’s words made me feel guilty. I didn’t give her support but caused her more pain. I shouldn’t behave like that with her. She had been molested god Damn it! And I was busy in preaching to her do’s and don’ts. She must be heartbroken. How can I expect her to behave sensibly in such situation? Instead of comforting her, what all I showed is my anger. May be that’s why she behaved so rudely with me. Should I go and check her? She will be fine or not? Mom said “she must be sleeping” but how can she sleep when here I am disturbed this much. I am sure her condition will be worst than me. After giving much thought I finally decided to check her once. May be after that I can have a peaceful sleep. I went to the store room took bunch of duplicate keys of all the rooms and moved towards her room. Without making much noise I unlock the door of her room… not to my surprise she was standing there, near the window holding someone’s picture. I felt bad seeing her condition. She was still in her party dress, her eyes were red due to crying. Seeing her like this, the first thought came to me is that what should I do to reduce her pain? But the question is how? When I was busy in my own thoughts, I heard her saying something. She said “baba” looking at the photo frame she was holding. She must be missing him terribly. I can understand that because I felt the same in odd situations when my dad left me. At least I had Adarsh bhai with me but she was all alone. Her little conversation with her dad’s picture made me feel pain and guilt at the same time. From the very first day I met her at Mr. Das’s place till now, I had seen her as a strong girl, strong young girl but today she was looking so weak. Crying and begging for some peace in her life. Eventually she broke down. I couldn’t control myself and rushed to her.
Sanskar: (holding her shoulder) Swara!!!
She didn’t anticipate anyone’s arrival in her room at this hour of the day. When she felt someone’s touch on her shoulder, she gets startled. She turned to see the person and shocked to find Sanskar there. He was looking into her eyes with lots of care and concern and this is what she was craving for since that horrible incident. And what she did next made him astound. Much to his surprise she hugged him tightly and started crying. At first he was shocked at her behavior, he never thought she will do something like this after their last encounter. May be she will refuse to see him, he thought. But what she did was unexpected. Eventually he hugged her back, placing his one hand on her waist and with other he started caressing her hair to comfort her, to assure her that “he is with her”. They stayed like this for quiet long. She cried her heart out clinging to him tightly. And he let her do that holding her silently, didn’t utter a word. He knew sometimes silence is better than words. And he did the same. When he realized she stopped crying and became little calm he decided to talk to her. He wanted to make her understand that he never wished her to do anything like that what she thought.
Sanskar: (softly) Swara…. Are you ok?
His voice brought her back to her senses. She realized that she was hugging him. Suddenly she broke the hug and stepped back from him. She was looking down due to embarrassment. He noticed it and moved little close to her.
Sanskar: (softly) it’s ok Swara… you need not to feel embarrassed at anything.
This time swara realized that he was calling her by her name. She looked at him with little surprise. Last time when she noticed it was at terrace when he raised his hand on her. But this time his emotions were totally different. Sanskar realized the reason of her surprise, so to avoid the awkwardness he continued.
Sanskar: Miss Bose…. Mom told me that she came to your room but you didn’t replied so…
He was searching for words to justify his presence in her room at this hour of the day when Swara interrupted…
Swara: (composing herself) It’s ok Mr. Maheshwari… well you thought of me, thank you for that.
Sanskar noticed that her eyes again became emotionless like they were when he walked away from her angrily at terrace. He remembered her words which made him loose his control few hours ago and now he was restless. He held her one hand and made her sit on the bed and took a seat on the chair in front of her. They looked at each other, staring deep into the eyes trying to read the mind of other.
Sanskar: (in calm voice) I know what happened today is unfortunate. And I know it is not easy for you to forget all this but still don’t punish yourself for other’s misdeeds. You are a strong girl and don’t let anyone make you weak.
Swara looked at him with surprise. She never expected such words from him. Sanskar noticed her perplexed face.
Sanskar: (looking into her eyes) Miss Bose there are millions of such people who will always in search of opportunity to hurt you but don’t let them do so…
Swara: (with pain) but I am tired of pretending to be strong… am used to of living under my father’s protection. He never let any evil to touch me… and now everybody is treating me like a thrash…
Her eyes again brimmed with tears. Sanskar felt her pain, he knew not only Kunal’s misbehavior hurt her but also his own actions made her feel like this. Now he was feeling guiltier.
Sanskar: you know very well Miss Bose that you are not a thrash… and nobody can treat you like one ok! (With guilt) And am sorry for the way I behaved with you… but do you really think so low about me?
Swara recalled her words which she burst out in anger in front of him. She was feeling ashamed of herself. How she could use such low words for her own self, she thought. And she knew it very well that Sanskar was rude and arrogant sometimes but he is not like that. She was nervous now, with her head down…..didn’t know what to answer. He could see her nervousness.
Sanskar: (calmly) I was angry on you because you were standing there like a dumb, letting him do what he wants to. Why didn’t you shouted or protested?
Swara looked at him and she saw the restlessness visible in his eyes. She took a deep sigh and replied.
Swara: I didn’t react like that because of you.
Sanskar was confused with her answer. He gave a questionable look to her.
Sanskar: (shocked) what? Me!!
Swara: yes… it was your business party so I didn’t want to create any scene over there and spoil the party. Secondly he was your investor in the project so I decided to deal with him as politely as I can because I don’t want to create any trouble for you.
Sanskar: (to himself) this girl is mad…. She is bearing all the torture just because of my project and that stupid party! Oh god what I do with her?
Sanskar: (smile slightly) you are impossible Miss Bose…. There is no need to be an altruist. And by the way next time please don’t act childishly…. Think of yourself first then about others. Is that clear to you?
Swara: (little angry) Mr. Maheshwari I never acted childishly…. And Yeah you are right I should learn to be little selfish.
Sanskar smiled seeing her fierce shade back. Seeing her like that was a big relief for him. He kept on arguing with her just to bring her back to normal and he did. After sometime he asked her to sleep and left from there.
Precap: let’s see what will happen…..