Swaragini “his feelings” (Episode 1)

Prologue: This track focuses upon the situation where laksh and swara were in the farmhouse & swara forgave laksh & laksh also freed swara from forcing her to get back into his life & they became friends again. Ragini is out of the room and sanskar just entered in the farmhouse to sign certain business documents from laksh & listened their loud cheers. Ragini in the mean time convinced sanskar that swara agreed to give a chance to laksh..
Beep.. Beep.. Beep..
Doctor: nurse, the patient’s condition is decreasing. Go tell their family members about the gravity of the situation.
Nurse comes outside and yells ” are all of you the family members of Mr.Maheswari?” & continues his situation is worsening in every passing moment. We can only try but the patient needs to fight to get back his life. Looking at him, it seems he has no desire to live anymore. So , pray god that the operation may come out successful. By saying all this in one go, nurse again rushes to the operation theater.

A girl listening all these becomes motionless & scattered. DP comes near her & consoles her. But she is unable to respond & only tears are rolling down from her eyes & touching her cheeks. Every tear of her eyes reminds her the moments she had spent with him… his husband.. “Mr. Sanskar Maheswari”.

By seeing her condition,all MM people also get worried. In the mean time sujata holds her hand.
Sujata: swara,swara..because of you my son is in this condition. You are unlucky for him. He loves you so much and you only used him to fulfil your ambitions.
DP shouts sujata to stop saying all those things but sujata does not pay any heed to him.
Just then the light of operation theater goes down and doctor comes outside. Everyone is rushing towards him except swara, only sitting on the floor and unable to move from there.
Doctor: we have done our job. But the next 24 hours is crucial for him. If he does not gain consciousness then he may likely go to coma or even die.
Sujata can’t hold it back and yelled Swara.

Sujata: swara, my son has given his life for your happiness and its your time to pay back. I beg before you please save my son. He does not have any desire to live. Please give him a cause to live. A mother is begging before you for his son.please save him.
Laksh is listening all this & is in deep thoughts,” why swara is in this state? What is affecting her? Why she is having so much pain? ” and becomes confused.
Swara is now only concentrating on sujata’s words & it’s repeating on her eardrums ” it’s your time to pay back” . she can’t resist her emotions anymore & cried loudly.
RP comes to her and patted his hand and her shoulder to console her & gives her a handkerchief to wipe her tears. This made her cry more loudly by imagining the moments when sanskar also did the same to console her at times. After so much time , Swara utters a word, ” dad, sanskar will be fine na” I know I have made many mistakes but he can’t do this to me. He can’t live me like this. He had promised to be with me when I need him.I need him dad.. I need my friend.. my best friend… He will be fine na dad… Please say something…
RP & DP both hugs her and calm her but unable to do so. Just then doctor arrives & tells it’s already 2 hours from completion of operation. But still the patient is not gaining consciousness. Any one member can meet him and persuade him to fight back for his life. By saying so, doctor leaves from the sight.

DP is going to meet sanskar but sujata stops him.
Sujata: Bhaisa, please let swara go inside. I know my son & his feelings. Only swara can make him fine. Please forgive me for stopping you to go inside but it’s the situation of my son’s life. By saying so she turns to swara and continues swara, look I am very sorry to comment you for your Bangali status! I am sorry that I never accepted you as my daughter in law. I always harass you but please don’t give the punishment to my son. I am begging before you to bring back my son’s life. I will always obliged to you for the rest of my life. And sujata breaks down on floor & becomes unconscious.

Swara rushed to her and promised her by taking her head on her lap that she will not let any thing happen to sanskar. AP,DP, RP, Laksh, Adarsh all are worried for sujata’s situation & tell swara to meet sanskar and they will control sujata.

Hospital room:
Sanskar is lying on bed like a small baby.. Motionless.. With oxygen mask on his face.. All the chords are connected to his body to give him external blood supply. But his body does not want to reciprocate as he is devastated by the feeling that swara will be no more his wife as she accepted laksh. Though he never forced swara to be his wife but her presence brings happiness on his face. But noe everything is going to be changed & he is not that brave to see swara to be his brother’s wife though he is happy for his brother.he wants peace , wants to leave this cruel world where his no emotions exist.

Oh love of mine
With a song and a whine
You’re harsh and divine
Like truths and a lie
He is in thoughts connecting all the incidents of his life. How he used swara to complete his revenge but changed because of her very nature… How swara blamed him for ruining her life & their fake marriage to reveal ragini’s truth … Its all flashed back in his memory … He does not know if their marriage is a truth for swara or not as she always told him that she was doing all this for her family’s sake. “Then what about me swara?”he asked himself..

But the tale ends not here
I have nothing to fear
For my love is yell of giving and hold on
He still is smiling in his thoughts as he never expected anything in return from swara. He just wants to repent for his misdeeds and in return he wants only her peace, her smile, her happiness. He had already lived his life with kavita. In his 2nd life when swara entered and blossomed his love again .. He never desired anything in return. Also he can die peacefully as no guilt is present in his heart. He repented for all his misdeeds & made everybody happy by his fake smile.

And the bright emptiness
In the room full of it
Is a cruel mistress
His room , opps ” their room” which he shared with swara for the continuation of fake marriage always deprived of love. His mind and heart are in dilemma to accept what he had seen in farmhouse … His mind echoes their(laksh & swara) loud cheers and ragini’s word but heart still denies that swara can’t go back to laksh. But mind suggests him that ‘You fool’, laksh is her first love. As you are unable to forget kavita how come swara is able to forget laksh?? What you have heard in farm house is right. Sanskar’s mind over shadowed his heart’s feeling.. He felt being cheated that swara always denied her & laksh’s relationship but stabbed him from back by revealing her acceptance for laksh. He is scattered, feeling of being left behind.

I feel the sunrise.
That nest all hollowness
For I have nowhere to go & I’m cold.
He is shivering from inside .. The feeling of getting dejected by her love gives him restlessness. He remembered how after leaving the farm house, his world is forced to darkness again..the bright sunlight of the day is unable to bring sunshine in his life & how suddenly his car faced an accident when he rotated the steering & his head hit hard on steering & blood rushed out from his head. But still he could not feel the pain as the external pain is nothing in the presence of his deep sorrow which he is carrying in his heart.
And I ‘m so lonely yeah
There’s a better place than this
EMPTINESS , yeah!!
When he remembered all sort of incidents of his life, he feels that his presence is no more required. If he leaves this world then his brother lucky can get his love, his love swara can be freed from all commitments & his family will never be ashamed because of him.
By thinking so, he closes his thoughts and is starting to be departed from this body to mingle with eternity. Just then he heard the sound of opening of door & feels her presence… Her love’s presence.. And wants to touch her, feel her presence for last time before going for a peaceful sleep & to never return back…

To be continued…..

This is a 2 shot ff and this is my first ff. There are lots of stories and lots of fabulous writers in this page.. Though I am not as good as them, but I tried to write. Do comment guys you like it or not. It will provide my confidence.

Credit to: Kashis


  1. lavanya

    plz tell me how to post ff i followed all the instructions and wrote a ff of 1029 words but tu is not accepting it.

  2. How can u say that? Your fan fiction is superb. Please continue!
    I always had been a silent reader of all the other fan fiction but from now on I am gonna comment, specially on your fan fiction.
    The last thing is that… Please please please….!!! get Sanskaar saved!

    • kashis

      thanx Sonia.. I m honoured that u commented on my ff..it motivated me a lot… ur wish will b fulfilled soon.

  3. u are too good n please continue ………..please make ragini positive soon , she is my favorite ……….u are awesome writer …..your first ff rocked ……update soon ……:-)

    • kashis

      actually I think 2 complete this ff in 2 episodes.. but u liked it.. so do u want me to continue it?? if o continue then ur wish will be fulfilled.. I also don’t like negative character… I also like ragini..

  4. Tara

    Wen i ws reading tis fiction, i felt like reading twilight stry.. fantastic fiction nd urs words r sumthng beyond extraordinary. Ur fluency n d lang nd d wrds used 2 describe his feelng 2 d depth s such a thng tat makes me 2 search 4 wrds 2 praise ur writing. Ur writing s n such a way tat u r a 20 yrs experienced book author. Awesome. Contine ur wrk

  5. joya

    dnt compare urself to other dear..bcz every writer is different.everyone’s thinking is different….trust me u r superb
    u r storyline is really good…

  6. Reeta

    Good one,especially,you included the emptiness song in between,by Rohan Rathore,if I’m not wrong,Oh love of mine….emptiness..good choice of lyrics to add magic to your fan fiction.

  7. Veena(Vini Ross)

    Kashis,nice start,and the lyrics in between is from emptiness,no?it is a personal favourite,good to see that you included those lines in between Sanskar’s thoughts.

  8. That was really good 🙂 the best part was the flow.. The continuity. You really are a good writer. And why don’t you make this a little different by narrating the story from the point of view of Sanskaar as well as Swara? I mean this episode was Sanskaar’s and the next would be Swara’s emotions and feelings. #just_a_suggestion 🙂

    • kashis

      u just read my thought… next will be swara’s… so I made it 2 shot ff… but if u guys want to proceed this ff then I will continue..

  9. Saba

    A big awwwwweeee!! For the way, you described the story! Your way is tremendous, I feel real chronicle in you, keep it kashis! I’m used to read your comment. Actually because of exams, I’m not reading much of ff, I’m avoiding new ff, but honestly say! I decide to read your ff after watch the quantity of comments! This is really worth of my time! Every sentence, every word, you delivered perfectly! For my today’s episode,(ep dancing with moonlight) I thought, it’ll be awesome! But I’m not feeling any shame to saying that, your episode beat my latest episode is also!

    • kashis

      thanx saba… u r an amazing writer… I still remembered that day when i read all ur episodes in one go.. thanx u liked it… it means a lot to me…

    • Saba

      Thanks kashis! And I think you should continue this ff from Sanskar’s perspective, as we all love him! But this is just a suggestion! Waiting for your next update

  10. Shipra

    I can feel every emotion of ur writing….omg….i swear it bought tears in my eyes..No kidding…will be waiting 4 d next part..awesome ff

  11. Veena(Vini Ross)

    And Kashis,u should continue,bring out as many episodes as u can,cos the start is so promising and I know a lot more is to be expected from you..

  12. saljaz

    Brilliant…this word also seems small to praise your writing …i really loved how you gave the vivid descriptions of every emotion ….it drew images in my mind…all the best to your ff…n keep it up

  13. sri

    its simply amazing yaar… very very emotional… description of feelings is superb.. waiting eagerly for next update

  14. joya

    plz Update as soon as possible…..
    i cnt explain bt every word every sentence is just perfect….
    u won my heart…
    i was always waiting for veena di’s updates….truely speaking jab se tumhara update padha hai har 15 min k baad check kar rahe hai hum telly update ki yeh site….
    plz update as soon as possible dear plzzzzzzzzzz

  15. radhika

    Wow kashish ur ff is jast fabolous…I literally cried …plz plz continue n write many episodes possible for u…I m a silent reader but i could not control myself from commenting…go on dear

  16. sumi

    today i was feeling bored,, and when i came in this site.. as i usually read ff frm this site… then i saw ur ff.. it was new for me ur ff.. i was confused whether i should read it or not.. then i opened ur ff.. how much i read ur ff that much i started to fall in ur ff.. words by words.. each and every its doesnt let me to stop loving ur ff.. really i wanna appreciate u, admire u for giving us such a lovely fanfiction.. and i want u to plz continue this…

  17. Kiara

    Seriously awesome…
    Just love the flow. The words you used to describe everything loved it very much…!!
    Last para instantly touched my heart…
    You have a magic in ur ff <3

  18. sethooty

    Oh my god its awesome..I decided to read this ff only bz of huge comments posted here( as u know site is flooded with many ff).after reading this I must say..u r amazing yaar.the way u conveyed sanskar emotions… Especially in last part..superb waiting for next part

  19. kirti

    Hey kashis n veena di thanx fr tellng da song i dwnloded it juz 2day itself n got dat its juz fab. Thnx once again

  20. ruchi

    Very beautifully written… Though I read the other episodes of this ff first, I am going to read all the next episodes again.

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