Do Premiyon Kee Durghatana (Episode 7 and Episode 8)
The crash of two lovers- Yuvraaj and Suhani
Late again, ik ik, but I have just finished all my exams now all my exam revision is piling on top of me for the real exams starting in May, but I have decided to write again for all you lot x
7 more letters left 😉
And guys I have seen many ffs on this website now, especially dedicated to Kriyyam- but I haven’t got the chance to comment- so I am just saying that I have been reading them and they are all outstanding keep it up x
I have also been writing books on this Website called Wattpad and my username is xCrpticc if you want to check any of them out xx
Now here is the episode
‘I don’t even know if you would read this meri sadu Kumar… I now feel defeated… because look at me now.
I am here praying with my hopeless optimism Yuvraaj, praying and praying every day hoping that you would miraculously wake up and shower me with the kisses I have been longing for. I am here hoping that you would cradle me in your arms again and run your fingers untangling each knot in my hair from each adventure that we would do. But look at me, for a year now, and now just pleading (maybe to a God that maybe doesn’t even exist!), I am slowly realising that chasing you Is futile, absolutely futile.
Funnily enough, Yuvraaj, I always used to say I would die for you, but now look, you’re not even dead, you are just lingering for me to die, and may I tell you, I already have. Inside I am a corpse of an effervescent being that used to be, the Suhani Shrivastav that used to light up an obscure room.
I am just breathing, because all I do each day is stare at your face eager that you would wake up, but, no. I was senselessly irrational the past year.
Every day I am here Yuvraaj sitting by your side for hours upon end, just anticipating for your finger to convulse and your eyelids to flutter open in the most majestic way, sometimes I feel as if God relishes torturing me, like you are, sadistically, just murdering me with that small side sneer that is always plastered on your pale blue lips.
Now look, I am thinking you are just mocking, only today I am starting to realise this- and I feel dumb.
I am starting to think that our love wasn’t love, it was just a mere infatuation- I am losing belief in this Yuvraaj- something I have chased, ever since I was a child, something I had held so dearly to my heart. Finally, shredded into millions of pieces of imprudence, throwing into a pit of fire (my anger) representing how stupid I feel after forever believing in the princesses and princes of Disney, falling in love- finding their one. Hah, naïve, too fairy tale for this life. Because Yuvraaj- guess what, you, and you only, made me lose everything as I am slowly starting to realise that you just wanted to leave me all this time- you were just waiting for me to turn my back so you could wake up and go to Soumya…
Soumya, my so-called best friend, the girl who you assumed to have ‘loved’ before me until you assumedly confessed your profound love to me.
I remember those three words; “I love you, Shrivastav, meri Jungi billi, my Suhani” I also remember how the fireworks were exploding deep down in my stomach while your lips perfectly interlocked with mine- but deep down, Yuvraaj, deep down I always felt you were lying, but my INJUDICIOUS, EVER SO RECKLESS feelings contradicted my assumptions. Now, I regret not listening to them, as I wouldn’t be here now, mourning over someone who doesn’t even love me, I wouldn’t be here now, trying so hard to let go, I wouldn’t be here writing these letters hoping that you would read them if you do decide to re-enter this convoluted world.
Yuvraaj, God knows, what would happen next…
I am slowly giving up.
On you, on us…
I stare looking at this letter grasped between my fingers, my hands shaking furiously as I feel my eyes stinging.
I never knew I had made someone feel in such a way…
I feel as if I should’ve died instead of surviving brain dead.
I fling my head back down in the hard hospital pillow, looking at the remaining stack of letters left for me to try and rejoice ‘memories’.
“HAH I HATE YOU YUVRAAAAAJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ,
I DON’T UNDEERSTAND WHY YOU DIDN’T LET MEE DRINKK BEFOREE!
IT IS MAKING ME REALISEE THE SPEELLLL YOU CASTED OVER ME!
HA! I NOW WHAT A MISTAKE YOU AREEE!
MY BIRLA, KEEP BEING YOUR EGOTISTICALL SELF, I DON’T NEED YOUU, I HAVE ROHAN JII HE LET MEE DO WHAT I WANT TO, UNLIKE YOU AND YOU CONTROLLING GRASPPPPP”
My heart shattered at the first line, ‘I hate you’… Maybe I deserve this punishment for the pain I have instilled, like look at her drunk state while writing this letter, I didn’t let her live.
I guess we were too young to understand, or maybe I was being controlling as I didn’t want to lose someone like her…
AND THAT IS A WRAP GUYSSSSS
Hope you enjoyed this episode, I think I like this Drunken Suhani, she speaks her mind, anyway please do comment your thoughts x
7 more letter like I said, I might be merging letters together and ect, but that is my approximation x
Hope you enjoyed guys x
*Question, who is your favourite character of the current track?*