Hello everyone..i know i m late..but there is a bad news for u all… I really dont know when i will be posting d next chp…coz well my mom has started getting strict..nd she gives me my phone for a very limited time..i can’t manage to write in such a short time..i usually write at night…in peace..but nowadays she keeps my phone at night..so i really really can’t guarantee u..when d next chp will be up…this one…i had written it bfr…but i still wanted to do the editing stuff…but no time..so sorry to disappoint u..maybe i will comment late on ur ffs..but i surely will…nd m not leaving uu all or something…m here only..just my ff…huh..its in a problem…so now news up…enjoy this chp..coz don’t know abt next chp..
So days passed with him trying to persuade me and flirting with me. Everything was going as it was but one thing that was not, was our relationship. Its not that we were going through some crisis or something. We still spent long hours in each other’s company, talked and talked. He would still try to persuade me to give an answer but I didn’t. Now why didn’t I give an answer? Because my mind had come to a conclusion that both options would cost me to loose him. How? If I said no, then the consequences would be unpredictable and I didn’t want to see him broken. Then I could have said yes right? Its obvious but no, I was not sure about my feelings towards him. What if the same thing happened with him like what happened with Adi? I was still regretting for that mistake, I couldn’t afford to make another.
So I let the it be. Though I didn’t say to him, I allowed him with everything that he expected me to. One thing that I didn’t allow was to kiss me. He was just obsessed with that one kiss. I wondered if it was all about this?
Over the days our fights grew. He would often get angry at me for silly reasons or get possessive about me in seeing me with Adi. Yeah one more thing that changed was his and Adi’s relations. They both started to hate each other, especially Shravan. I don’t know the exact reason but I am sure I played a major role. So our fights grew but he would always come back to me and say sorry. I always forgave him, for countless mistakes he did. The most I did was not to talk to him for some days but my heart would melt at the end seeing his eyes which sought forgiveness.
Emotional pain hurts more than physical pain.
We were not talking to each other due to some stupid fight we had. So, it was evening and we were playing badminton when me and him were in opposite teams. We started playing. He was venting out all his anger, hitting smashes after smashes. One smash hit me on the back of my left palm. After the match, I stormed out of the court and went away from there. I was furious about him doing this. How could he do this? I was thinking of our fight and everything and when I returned to my hostel, I took a look at my hand. I had scratched it up all where he had hit me. It was all red with the marks made from my nails. Tears began to swell up.
After a few days, he followed his routine and said sorry to me.
” You hurt me, physically this time. ” I said to him.
” Hey, I know but that was not at all intentional. It was just that I was angry. I never wanted to hurt you.” He replied.
Day after Shravan was growing angrier. He was changing and I feared to predict what was becoming of him.
” But I felt so.” Tears again began to fill.
I had been crying a lot because of him in those days. He would often hurt me and just come and say sorry. It happened so much that at the end the word ‘sorry’ carried no meaning to me. It always sounded fake. Till today I hate that word. It reminds me of the pain that preceded it.
” Look, I am so sorry okay? I said right, that I was angry.” Saying this he took my scratched hand into his and the touch again did something to me.
” Please don’t say sorry every time. This is really good right, that first you hurt someone and then you have just one word to say-‘sorry’. ” I was fed up of this ever happening silly fights and his anger and temper.
” How did this happen?” He asked shocked as he moved his thumb over my scratched skin.
” My way to remind you of the mistake you did.” I knew that will hurt him. It always did, when I was hurt.
” Oh my god Suman. You shouldn’t have done that, you really shouldn’t have. Never punish yourself because of my ego and anger. Please, I can’t see you like this.” He looked at me and his face showed pain.
I looked away as a fat tear rolled down from the corner of my eye. What happened? I once again forgave him.