Hello peeps….m back wid my next chp….thank you for bearing wid me till now….but let me inform u..that u hve a lot more to bear….coz i told in d beginning that this will need patience…so mysteries will be revealed wid time…..i know u want Shravan’s entry..but u need to wait….coz d actual appearance is a bit later…though flashbacks of what actually happened r coming up soon…okay i guess i hve revealed too much….but i know it would have been unfair from my side to keep u in d dark for such a long time….
So readers this one needs patience…
And yaah plz do tell me frankly..if u find it boring….it would help me to know my mistakes …love u all so much…now here comes….
I am still taking the practise and roaming around here and there when I see Priya scribbling something in her notebook. At first I think it may be something related to the programme or studies, but her expressions tell a different story. She is fully into it, as if reliving something, as if she is in a different world. I move over to her.
” Hey Priya?” I say and she jumps in her place. She immediately closes her notebook as if it contains a top secret information which I might steal.
” What were you writing?” I ask her thinking she might not want to reply to that but she just smiles at me and says,
” That is my personal diary.”
” Oh.” I can get only one word out of my mouth.
” Do you have any?” She asks me out of curiosity.
” Umm, I used to maintain one.” I reply not wanting to say anymore but she insists, ” So?” She asks.
” Nothing, now it might be lying in some dump yard or maybe not even there. I threw it a year back.” I say.
Her eyes grow wide listening to it.
” Hey that was just because I found it silly and I didn’t want anyone to read it.” I lie.
” But its a really good habit you know, maintaining diaries and letting out the emotions. Your diaries are the only ones who listen to you even when you talk nonsense.” I grin at her.
She grins back.
” Okay now, be back for practise soon.” I say and leave fearing that I will blurt out the truth.
Although it has been long since I threw my diary but I don’t know why I mostly remember all that I wrote in it even though I don’t want to.
I have vague images of those pages stored in my mind and even the memories related to it.
I feel suffocated. Out of air. Not able to concentrate. I feel sick.
I have to wrap this practise really quickly before I loose control of myself. And suddenly Shreya’s question from the morning echoes in my head, ” Where did you get lost?”
Where did I go from where I feel that its impossible to come back? Its like even though I have returned from my journey, the journey still remains incomplete. Its like I have left some part of me behind which is calling me back to it again and again.
I take the practise one final time and just storm out of the auditorium. The evening breeze hits my face. Its evening, I realise. My time. But today I feel the need of being alone even more, because wherever I go or whomever I meet, I am forced to walk down the streets of my past.
I decide to go the lake today. It has been a lot of days since I went there. I start to walk to my once favourite destination. Even now it still is but it has lost its charm. Its like, just like me even the lake has left a part of it in the past.
I jog a few miles before I see Adi standing there with his friends. Some seniors whom I know and some whom I don’t. He turns his face in my direction. I look back. And then I move. I here the chattering among them and I feel their eyes on my back. This forces me to start an altogether different story of my past in my mind.
And I do begin.